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The Lure of Lesser Lights

The best way to keep Jesus in the center of the Christmas season is to keep Him central in our daily lives, especially when we feel too busy.

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Jesus tells us: “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” (John 8:12) The many lights that twinkle during the Christmas season celebrate this truth. I like to believe that all lights people hang at this time of year give Him praise, whether they were intended to or not. However, as much as I love this season, I often take my eyes off Jesus. Sometimes the true Light is only in my peripheral vision as I let lesser lights guide me during this hectic time of year.

The Bible reminds us that God’s word is a lamp for our feet and a light for our paths. (Psalm 119:105) However, spending quiet time with the Lord can get pushed aside as other things vie for our attention. So many shiny lights blink with urgency that it’s easy to let them guide us in place of God’s Word.

One of the biggest pitfalls for us is the lure of meeting expectations that abound during this season. All of those real or imagined hopes we try to fulfill lead us down a path to exhaustion.   We can spend the season trying to find the right gift, decorate the house exquisitely, bake everyone’s traditional favorites, wear the perfect Christmas outfit, or maintain cherished traditions. The season can become engulfed with fulfilling expectations. However, when we let them be the lamp to our feet and the light to our path, we often end up feeling physically and emotionally depleted.

Every day we have to make a conscious choice: we can choose to light our paths with the world’s expectations or we can choose to light our paths by spending time with the Lord in His Word. The light we choose to lead us influences the direction we go. One path leads to disappointment, the other to joy. The best way to keep Jesus in the center of the Christmas season is to keep Him central in our daily lives, especially when we feel too busy. Even if our formal Bible study groups are on a break for the holidays, our personal times with God can continue. It is the one thing that will keep us in alignment with Him during this busy season and into the New Year. Let’s not let the “urgent” tasks of the moment cause us to sacrifice what is ultimately most important.

Thinking about this reminded me of a letter my husband and I wrote to our boys last Christmas. We’d bought them new Bibles and wanted to explain their importance. Our goal was to help them understand the reason we make reading and studying the Bible a priority in our lives. Here is a short excerpt from that letter:

“Our hope and prayer is that as you get older, you will immerse yourself in God’s word and see that it is the jumping off place for everything in life. It will give you wisdom about your daily choices, your relationships, your future plans, and so much more. It will show you who God is and what He thinks of you. It will show you how to pray and what to pray for. It will equip you with the tools you need to engage in spiritual battle. It will give you confidence to obey God when it would be easier to follow the crowd. It will give you hope no matter what difficulty you find yourself in. It will tell you the truth when the world tells you lies. It will give you a firm foundation for making big life decisions. It will give you wisdom when you don’t know what to do. But, it will only do these things if you take the time to read it, study it, and talk about it with others. As you “marinate” in the Bible, the truth you discover will flavor who you are and impact the world around you. You will further God’s kingdom on earth as you live out the things you learn in the Bible.”

This Christmas season, let’s not let our Bibles gather dust on our shelves as we’re on a break from our usual routines and engrossed in the holiday season.   Before you turn on your computer or tablet, check your phone, unfold the newspaper, or click on the TV, try sitting quietly with Him for a few minutes at the beginning of your day.

-Read through the Christmas story in Luke 1 and 2 and Matthew 1 & 2 and prophesies about Jesus in Isaiah 9:2-7, Isaiah 42:1-9, Isaiah 55:1-13 and Micah 7:18-20.

-Review your most recent Bible study workbook and complete the parts you skipped during the busyness of the fall.

-Write a short prayer. Commit your day to God and trust Him to guide you. Ask the Holy Spirit to fill you.

The things that seem so urgent will still be there when you’re finished. The ones that need your attention will get done and the others won’t matter quite so much.

If these suggestions sound idealistic and unrealistic because of your hectic schedule, pray that God will multiply your time. He’s ready and waiting to spend time with you and will orchestrate your day to make it possible. All you have to do is ask.

Start a new tradition this Christmas and make time daily to let God’s Word light your path instead of letting expectations be your primary guiding light. Instead being disappointed and exhausted, you’ll find God’s Word leaves you fulfilled and energized. As His peace rests upon you, you’ll bless others in a way that outshines fulfilling even the grandest of expectations.

Click on the link to celebrate the true Light of Christmas with Chris Tomlin’s “Light of the World.”

Only One Thing is Needed This Christmas

Are we so busy making exterior preparations for Christmas that we are forgetting the interior preparation of our hearts?

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My kids anticipate December with glee. I approach it like a set of tasks to be tackled. With the Christmas season upon us, the notepad I keep on my desk has an ever-growing list scrawled on it. As soon as I cross something off, I’m adding several more things that need to be done. I feel the joy and wonder of the Advent season only after I’ve accomplished everything that “needs” to be done, which usually happens sometime around midnight on December 24.

My endless list making, shopping, decorating, and baking often cause me to miss the best part of the season: focusing on the significance of Jesus’ arrival on earth. This incessant busyness reminds me of the story of Mary and Martha:

“As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, ‘Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!’

‘Martha, Martha,’ the Lord answered, ‘you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.’” (Luke 10:38-42, NIV)

Martha missed out on enjoying Jesus’ presence in her home because she was distracted making preparations for Him. When I imagine Him responding to Martha’s complaint about Mary, I picture Jesus speaking the words with love and tenderness. Rather than scolding her, I believe He wanted to change her perspective and show her what really matters.

Like Martha, we often make things more complicated than they need to be- especially when planning for Christmas. When our preparations make us worried and upset, it’s time to take a step back, get a new perspective and simplify. Sometimes we’re inspired to do something one season and when the next Christmas rolls around we feel obligated to do it again. Then, instead of being motivated by love, we’re trying to please people and cater to their expectations.   Soon, the gift or activity or recipe that started as an inspiration becomes a tradition we feel required to keep forever more.   I wonder how many of us maintain traditions that have lost their meaning, just because of our own expectations or the desire to please others.

Thinking about this reminds me of a lesson I learned after many years of trying to celebrate my son on his birthday. Starting when he was one year old, I would plan celebrations for him that included a large number of guests and activities. I put in a lot of effort orchestrating events that would be fun, food that would please a crowd and gifts that would delight him. Yet at each of his birthday parties, I noticed he was anxious and overwhelmed. He rarely seemed to be enjoying himself despite being surrounded by large numbers of friends and family members. Year after year, I tried to make special celebrations for him, but the outcome always seemed the same.

Finally, when he’d reached fifth grade, I was tired of planning elaborate parties and suggested he choose one friend to invite on a special outing. Rather than being disappointed about not having a big party, he seemed thrilled about spending time with a good friend at a place he enjoyed. The only thing that carried over from his previous celebrations was the type of cake he wanted me to bake. It was the easiest party I ever planned. It was also the most enjoyable one not only for my son, but for the rest of our family too. He still gets a dreamy look in his eyes and murmurs, “That was awesome” when we reminisce about it.

I wonder sometimes if it’s the same with Jesus. Does He watch us scurry around getting ready for His birthday and think, just stop and be with me! Does He look at our need to please others with the perfect gift and feel sad that we’re denying ourselves the time to enjoy His presence? Are we so busy making exterior preparations for Christmas that we are forgetting the interior preparation of our hearts?

I know from other seasons of busyness that when I spend time with Jesus first, everything else has a way of falling into place. Tasks that are important get completed and the rest just stop mattering so much. My prayer as we enter the Advent season is that we will make time for the “one thing that is needed.” When we focus on Emmanuel, God with us, we remember the true reason we celebrate this season.

Click on the link to hear Third Day’s song, “Christmas Like a Child.” I hope the lyrics will stir a deep joy in you, especially if you’ve lost your way and Christmas has become more of a chore than a celebration. Listen and remember that it’s all about Jesus. Let’s pray that everything we do this season will be motivated by our love for Him.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ws5xwBQFFAU

Grateful, Thankful, Blessed

On my birthday last year my husband and sons gave me a throw pillow with the words “Grateful, Thankful, Blessed” printed on it. The pillow sits on my family room couch and reminds me daily to reject the attitude of entitlement that has infected our culture. When we believe we “deserve” things, we become self-centered and superior. Having a thankful heart requires humility. Seeing the words “Grateful, Thankful, Blessed” when I start my day encourages me not to take the many blessings I have for granted and to be grateful for all that God has done for me.

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Preparing my heart for the upcoming Thanksgiving celebration, I’ve been reading through a familiar Psalm lately:

“Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth

Worship the Lord with gladness;

come before him with joyful songs.

Know that the Lord is God.

It is he who made us, and we are his;

we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.

Enter his gates with thanksgiving

and his courts with praise;

give thanks to him and praise his name.

For the Lord is good and his love endures forever;

his faithfulness continues through all generations.” (Psalm 100, NIV)

Although I’ve read it many times, a few things struck me in new ways (I love that about the Bible). Maybe some of these things will resonate with you too.

-It’s important to recognize truth about God’s character:

A big part of worshiping God and being thankful involves knowing who He is and what He’s done. Reminding ourselves of God’s attributes makes it possible for us to be even more thankful. The psalm reminds us of the foundation of our faith: He is good, His love endures forever and His faithfulness continues through all generations.

-It’s important to understand God’s superiority as well as His loving care:

The psalm points out that He is God, He made us, and we are His.   We are the sheep of His pasture, which means He watches over us and cares for us. Everything we have is from Him and we would not exist without Him.

-It’s important to approach God with a thankful heart:

Entering into God’s presence with a thankful heart enables us to draw near and praise Him. Sometimes I’m tempted to start my time alone with Him by asking Him to meet my needs first, but this psalm reminds me to start with praise and thanksgiving. Often when I do this, it gives me new perspective about what I need. Praising and thanking Him first puts both of us in our proper places- it elevates God and humbles me.

On my birthday last year my husband and sons gave me a throw pillow with the words “Grateful, Thankful, Blessed” printed on it. The pillow sits on my family room couch and reminds me daily to reject the attitude of entitlement that has infected our culture. When we believe we “deserve” things, we become self-centered and superior. Having a thankful heart requires humility. Seeing the words “Grateful, Thankful, Blessed” when I start my day encourages me not to take the many blessings I have for granted and to be grateful for all that God has done for me.

In light of this, I chose a few phrases from Psalm 100 that caught my attention and personalized them:

-God made me, which means He gave me my intellect, my gifts, my abilities, my body, and my personality. If I’m ever tempted to feel prideful or critical about any of these things, I have a distorted view of myself and am being ungrateful to God.

-I am His. I can find peace knowing that He holds me in His hands, even when I feel anxious or overwhelmed. He is with me and He is sovereign.

-His faithfulness continues through all generations. He was there with my parents and grandparents and He is there for my family now. He will be with my kids and their children after them. His faithfulness has no limitations and is not bound by time or place.

As you read Psalm 100, what phrases can you apply to your life? Can I encourage you to make it personal before you devote time to shopping, preparing food, or setting the table? Thanksgiving kicks off a holiday season of busyness, but don’t let the true meaning get buried under your “to do” list.

Here are a few ideas to think about before you pray your own psalm of thanksgiving:

What qualities of God’s character are you thankful for today?

What comforts you about knowing you are His?

How has he shown His faithfulness to you?

Is there anything you’ve been taking for granted that you can thank God for now?

For further inspiration, click on the link to hear Matt Redman’s song “10,000 Reasons.”

Happy Thanksgiving!

Feet Fitted with the Readiness of Peace

God equips us with what we need every time He invites us to grow past our comfort levels. However, we have a choice to make. Will we trust Him and fit our feet with the readiness of the gospel of peace or will we shrink back in fear?

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Peace is an absence of strife or anxiety. It is tranquility and serenity. Most of us long for a larger dose of it in our lives, both individually and globally.   When I imagine peace, I picture my anxieties put to rest. All is right within me and in the world around me. My relationships are harmonious, my surroundings are orderly and there is nothing to cause stress or discord. It seems, however, that these moments of peace are rare, mostly because they are based on exterior circumstances that are not within my control.

In both First and Second Thessalonians, Paul describes the Father as “the God of peace” (1 Thessalonians 5:23, NIV) and “the Lord of peace” (2 Thessalonians 3:16, NIV). Sometimes we want to interpret this to mean our lives will be free from difficulty. However, it’s no secret that the world is full of strife and discord. It’s been that way since Adam and Eve’s first bite of the apple in the garden.

We can be assured, however, that God will give us peace, regardless of our circumstances. When we surrender our illusion of control and trust Him, we’ll find a peace that “transcends all understanding.” (Philippians 4:7, NIV)

Beth Moore reminds us that we can trust in God’s peace even as spiritual battles rage all around us. “Peace never means more than in the context of war. Maybe one day in eternity God will let us see what was going on over our heads in the unseen realm while we were just trying to get through another day.” (Children of the Day, p. 206)

Paul gives a clear illustration of the weaponry we need to fight and defend ourselves in spiritual battle:

10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. 18 And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people. (Ephesians 6:10-18, NIV)

Among the items listed in our spiritual armor are “feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace.” (Verse 15) This contrasts the usual image I have of peace as being restful. I picture peace involving kicking off my shoes and lying down to relax. Here, however, peace comes from the readiness of putting on shoes and preparing for battle. And what is it that makes us ready? Knowing the “gospel of peace.” This kind of peace comes from Truth planted deep inside us that is based on trust in God. It is nothing like the peace that comes from exterior circumstances and the absence of strife. It is being ready for anything that comes our way because we know the almighty God has fit us for battle.

Beth Moore’s lesson on peace in Week 8, Day 4 of Children of the Day cites several verses in Deuteronomy that reassure us in times of battle. All of them say essentially the same thing: “Do not be afraid of them; the Lord your God himself will fight for you.” (Deuteronomy 3:22, NIV) God goes before us and fights the battle for us. We get to reap the benefits of His victory.

Giving some context to these words in Deuteronomy is helpful. God gives these promises to the Israelites as they are traveling from Egypt to the Promised Land.   In order to take the land, they will have to engage in battle. God reassures them that He will go before them and fight for them.

Beth Moore’s lesson doesn’t mention what happens next, but I think it’s a good warning for us. Despite God’s many promises, the people give in to fear and do not trust Him. He reassures them numerous times, but they fail to believe He’ll come through for them. The Old Testament book of Numbers 14 tells the sad story of the Israelites losing heart when they reach the Promised Land. Before entering it, they send in spies to scout it out. The spies return saying: “We went into the land to which you sent us, and it does flow with milk and honey! Here is its fruit. But the people who live there are powerful, and the cities are fortified and very large… We can’t attack those people; they are stronger than we are.”   (Numbers 13:27,28,31, NIV)

The Israelites panic upon hearing the spies’ report. “That night all the members of the community raised their voices and wept aloud. All the Israelites grumbled against Moses and Aaron, and the whole assembly said to them, ‘If only we had died in Egypt! Or in this wilderness! Why is the Lord bringing us to this land only to let us fall by the sword? Our wives and children will be taken as plunder. Wouldn’t it be better for us to go back to Egypt?’” (Numbers 14:1-3, NIV) They want to return to the land where they and their ancestors were enslaved for four hundred years.   In response, God pronounces this judgment against them: “For forty years—one year for each of the forty days you explored the land—you will suffer for your sins and know what it is like to have me against you. I, the Lord, have spoken, and I will surely do these things to this whole wicked community, which has banded together against me. They will meet their end in this wilderness; here they will die.” (Numbers 14:34-35, NIV)

God never promised the people peaceful circumstances, but He did promise He would go before them and that He would be with them. Instead of finding peace in that, they put their trust in their own logic. The odds looked like they were against them and they weren’t willing to believe the Lord, despite the fact that He’d never failed them before.

God equips us with what we need every time He invites us to grow past our comfort levels. However, we have a choice to make. Will we trust Him and fit our feet with the readiness of the gospel of peace or will we shrink back in fear?

It’s unlikely that He’s called you into a literal battle recently, however there are many other places He may be urging you to go with Him. Maybe it’s…

-Walking into the hospital room of a loved one

-Gearing up to have your contentious college student home for the holidays

-Facing a challenging situation at work

-Dealing with a relationship fraught with tension

-Preparing for a medical procedure you’re dreading

-Figuring out your finances and making a plan to get out of debt

-Answering the call to serve somewhere outside your comfort zone

-Pushing through your hesitation and sharing Jesus’ love with a hurting person

-Receiving the diagnosis you dreaded hearing

-Hosting houseguests with a gracious attitude

-Navigating the emotions of your unpredictable teenager

-Facing another sleep-deprived day caring for your little ones

-Showing grace to extended family members who make the holidays a challenge

Wherever your feet take you, I hope you’ll be praying as you put on your shoes each morning. Try something simple like this: “God please fit my feet with the readiness that comes from gospel of peace.” Take time to examine His word and to arm yourself with Truth as you face your day. Then, rest assured that God is with you wherever you go.

If you’re in a quiet, contemplative mood, you’ll be blessed by Laura Story’s song “Perfect Peace.”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xizx6XM8o70

If you’re looking for a song that will make you stand up and shout, don’t miss Chris Tomlin’s “Whom Shall I Fear?”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOkImV2cJDg

Moore, Beth; Children of the Day; Lifeway Press, 2014

Do Not Be Deceived

Despite the deceiving allure of sin, a world without God’s love and goodness would be far from appealing.

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“Yo, ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!” I sing and clap along with my seatmates as we float through the amusement park ride. Slipping past us are scenes of a seaside village being overrun by jovial pirates. On one side, a line of women tied together with a rope stands waiting for their turn on the auction block. A pirate auctioneer points out what wonderful “brides” they’ll make. Most of the women pose, smile and try to appear attractive. Further down we float past two drunken pirates recklessly shooting guns at one another while perched precariously on kegs of gunpowder. Describing these scenes without the catchy soundtrack that plays throughout the ride gives them a different feel. If we took the smiles off the characters’ faces, the playful nature would be gone altogether.

If I think about it, the scenes we’re witnessing in this ride are horrific. Marauding pirates are finding drunken pleasure in terrorizing a sleepy village while women are being sold to the highest bidder. Yet it’s depicted in such an appealing way that we laugh, smile, and hum the memorable tune as the ride comes to an end.

My example here isn’t intended to condemn the amusement park or the ride. However, it does provide a perfect example of how easily Satan deceives us by making blatant sin seem appealing, fun and harmless.   We can be so absorbed by his lies that we fail to realize the sins we embrace or choose to overlook are meant for our harm, not our good: “For the wages of sin is death.” (Romans 6:23a, NIV)

Maybe that’s why I like Paul’s clear words: “Don’t let anyone deceive you in any way.” (2 Thessalonians 2:3a, NIV) Our culture is full of deception as Satan lulls us into thinking of sin as fun and exciting while viewing righteousness as boring or unattractive. You don’t have to look very far in the world of advertising or entertainment to understand what I mean. We can easily be deceived into thinking that certain sins are “no big deal” or “all in good fun.” Rarely do we see the ugly consequences depicted later.

With our guards down we get lulled into complacency and compromise. Things that should upset us because they dishonor God no longer make us flinch. This is one of the many ways Satan deceives us and renders us ineffective as Christians. Jesus describes Satan as “a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.” (John 8:44b, NIV)

Despite the deceiving allure of sin, a world without God’s love and goodness would be far from appealing.   Beth Moore paints a vivid picture: “If the entire law of God hinged on love, swing your head the opposite direction and picture the exact reverse. In the light of that darkness, you’ll begin to formulate the basic structure of lawlessness. Feel the temperature of warm hearts plummet to frozen tundra. Picture a world where people couldn’t care less about their neighbor.” (Children of the Day p. 171)

A world devoid of God’s presence would be an awful place, even for those who do not acknowledge Him. The Bible tells us that God is good, God is light and God is love. He doesn’t just bring these things to earth; He is the embodiment of them. This means anywhere that light, goodness and love exist on the earth, God is present. I believe this is true even in places where people refuse to acknowledge Him. That is why “the hellishness of hell will be the absence of God.” (Children of the Day p. 172)

Let’s consider this for a minute with a few Scripture passages to help us.

God is Light

“In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters. And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. God saw that the light was good, and he separated the light from the darkness.” (Genesis 1:1-4, NIV)

“This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all.“ (1 John 1:5, NIV)

-Both passages above show that God created literal light and it is He who sustains it.

“When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, ‘I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.’” (John 8:12, NIV)

-Jesus is the light of the world and makes it possible for us to move from spiritual darkness into spiritual light.

“There will be no more night. They will not need the light of a lamp or the light of the sun, for the Lord God will give them light. And they will reign forever and ever. (Revelation 22:5, NIV)

-In the earth’s last days when Jesus returns, God will be the source of all light.

God is Good

“You are good, and what you do is good; teach me your decrees.” (Psalm 119:68, NIV)

-Strong’s Concordance explains: “God is good in the very widest sense of the word including His nature, character, and actions.”

God is Love

“Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.” (1 John 4:8, NIV)

-The Wycliffe Bible Commentary explains: “Love is not simply a quality which God possesses, but love is that which he is by his very nature.”

Can you imagine living without light, goodness or love? While some people may take them for granted or not acknowledge God as their source, we daily reap the benefit of their existence in our world.

As Christians we have to make a clear and intentional choice not to be deceived by Satan and his lies. Paul gives us the best remedy for this. “So then, brothers and sisters, stand firm and hold fast to the teachings we passed on to you, whether by word of mouth or by letter.” (2 Thessalonians 2:15, NIV)

We have the honor of holding the Word of God in our hands and have the freedom to access it at any time. We can study it alone using a multitude of resources or gather with others to learn and grow. Current events remind us that this is not the case everywhere in the world today. Let’s not take this great privilege for granted. We must be on our guards to avoid being lulled into complacency by attractively disguised sins. Engaging God’s word daily is the best defense for keeping ourselves from falling prey to deception.

“Forever Reign” by Hilllsong is a fantastic worship song describing some of God’s attributes that were highlighted in this post. Click on the link to hear some Truth set to music.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JRBQtIEEkrU

Moore, Beth; Children of the Day; Lifeway Press, 2014

Pfeiffer, Charles, F. & Harrison Everett F; Wycliffe Bible Commentary; Moody Press 1990, p. 1475

Strong, James; Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance of the Bible, Thomas Nelson, 2001, p. 103

Spiritual Gifts, Natural Abilities, Unplanned Ministries and Just Plain Obedience

When I’m serving in an area where I’m gifted, it doesn’t feel like work. It can be time consuming and challenging, but it also energizes me. I’ve also learned that my gifts only serve others well when I rely on God’s strength and wisdom instead of my own.

Garrett Undies

I’ll never forget the Christmas of 2001 when our first son was finally old enough to participate in holiday traditions.   On Christmas morning he jumped up and down anticipating the thrill of opening the packages peeking out from the top of his stocking. He tore into the first gift and held the prize high above his head, shouting with glee: “BIG BOY UNDERWEAR!!” Our ploy to make potty training alluring seemed to be working. He ran to his bedroom and returned moments later to model them proudly.

Underwear appeared among his gifts again the next Christmas. His reaction was not quite as exuberant. Every year since then, both of our boys have continued to receive this “gift,” more for the sake of tradition than anything else. With each phase of development, their reactions have been age appropriate.  They’ve gone from glee to embarrassment to annoyance to resignation to amusement. As long as stockings are hung on the mantel, underwear will be one of the gifts inside them.

Until a few years ago, I used to view spiritual gifts in a similar light to my boys’ perspective on receiving underwear. I thought my spiritual gifts were practical and useful, but not especially exciting. The problem wasn’t with the Giver however, but with me. I had confused spiritual gifts with my natural abilities.

I am good at organizing people and events. This isn’t meant to sound proud—I say it in the same way I would tell you I have brown hair and hazel eyes. It is just a fact about me. Because of this, I served different church ministries in a variety of administrative roles such as organizing logistics for committees, events, Bible studies, students and children. I didn’t particularly derive joy from my service, however I valued the impact each of these ministries had. I knew I could add to their effectiveness by helping them run smoothly.   Since administration was a spiritual gift, I assumed I had it.

The problem was, I was serving Jesus without Jesus. My organizational skills were part of my makeup, but not something that made my heart beat faster or caused me to lean into God for strength, wisdom and guidance. I was using my natural abilities for kingdom purposes, but it wasn’t exhilarating for me because my true spiritual gifts hadn’t been activated. Since learning more, I’ve seen people who have the gift of administration and I can recognize the difference. They get as excited about organizing and overseeing things as I do about teaching and encouraging others.

In light of this, Beth Moore’s comments make perfect sense to me:

“Your ministry is the ever-accruing collection of your life works for the glory of God…You won’t be satisfied until you are living it out because God wired you with a compulsion to do it…The more we ignore His will for our works, the more discontented and out of sorts we’ll be.” (Children of the Day, p. 142)

Scripture tells us that each person who accepts Christ receives the Holy Spirit. When this happens, we receive spiritual gifts. There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit…All these are the work of one and the same Spirit, and he gives them to each one, just as he determines. (1 Corinthians 12:4 & 11, NIV) The gifts God gives us are to be used to glorify Him and to build up our fellow believers. Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God’s grace in its various forms. (1 Peter 4:10, NIV)

Discovering I had the spiritual gifts of encouragement and teaching guided me in recognizing when to say “yes” and when to say “no” to different ministry opportunities. It was freeing when I realized declining to serve somewhere opened an opportunity for a person with gifts that were better suited for it.  Instead of focusing on pleasing people, I considered how I could best please God.  I stopped trying to fill open slots where needs were greatest and started praying for God to lead me to the places He wanted to use the gifts He’d given me.

The main difference between using my natural abilities and spiritual gifts is that when I’m serving in an area where I’m gifted, it doesn’t feel like work. I don’t dread preparing a Bible study lesson or have to “gear up” to spend time encouraging someone I’m mentoring.   It can be time consuming and challenging, but it also energizes me. I’ve also learned that my gifts only serve others well when I rely on God’s strength and wisdom instead of my own.

I think this is what Paul, Timothy and Silas meant when they wrote:

With this in mind, we constantly pray for you, that our God may make you worthy of his calling, and that by his power he may bring to fruition your every desire for goodness and your every deed prompted by faith. We pray this so that the name of our Lord Jesus may be glorified in you, and you in him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ. (2 Thessalonians 1:11-12, NIV)

There can be a temptation, however, to opt out of certain things because they don’t involve the use of our specific gifts. Sometimes God has unplanned ministries in which He’s calling us to serve. It could be a neighbor in distress or that emotionally needy person who is drawn to you.   God has a way of dropping opportunities in front of us and inviting us to respond.   In those times, we need to rely on Him for an extra measure of grace. God regularly uses challenging situations to stretch our faith and our dependence upon Him. In fact, the Bible tells us He has prepared them for us:

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. (Ephesians 2:10, NIV)

Other opportunities to give and serve are just part of being obedient to God’s word and have nothing to do with our spiritual gifts. We don’t get to take a pass on things like helping the needy or giving financially by saying we don’t have the gifts of compassion or generosity.

What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them?  Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it?  In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead. (James 2:14-17, NIV)

Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. (2 Corinthians 9:6-7, NIV)

Some acts of obedience are difficult and costly while others bring joy and delight. In either case, the choice to obey honors God and brings Him glory.

If you’re like I was and you’re just guessing at what spiritual gifts you have, can I encourage you to find out?  Take Beth Moore’s words to heart: “Your spiritual gifts are means by which you have been distinctively and divinely equipped to manifest God’s presence and power.” (Children of the Day, p. 143).  Start by reading Romans 12:4-8,1 Corinthians 12 and 1 Peter 4:8-11, then get resources to help you understand spiritual gifts and talk with a pastor to determine what yours might be.

If you attend church at CPC, take the S.H.A.P.E. assessment online and find out how God has uniquely designed you. If you don’t attend CPC, pick up a copy of the book S.H.A.P.E Finding and Fulfilling Your Unique Purpose for Life by Eric Rees. You’ll discover more about who God has made you to be so that you can activate your gifts and discover the joy of using them to further God’s kingdom.

Whether it’s natural abilities, spiritual gifts, unplanned ministries or acts of obedience, every good thing starts at the same source: God. Click on the link for a great reminder of this with the song “Every Good Thing” by The Afters.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FY2ycrpbOlw

Moore, Beth; Children of the Day; 2014; Lifeway Press; http://www.lifeway.com

Rees, Erik; S.H.A.P.E. Finding and Fulfilling Your Unique Purpose for Life; 2006; Saddleback Resources; www.saddlebackresources.com

 

The Can of Worms We Must Open

If we’re not actively engaging in shaping our kids’ sexual identities, we are letting the world do it for us. What they’re learning is completely contrary to God’s plan. We cannot allow our culture to influence our kids with the idea that the Bible’s teaching about sex is outdated or irrelevant.

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A few years ago I was hiking with a group of moms from my boys’ elementary school. Among the group of thirty friends and acquaintances, I ended up on the trail with two women that I only knew casually. As we climbed the winding path beneath a canopy of trees, one of them started sharing about her eight-year-old son who was asking questions about sex. She was shocked that a child still in elementary school was already curious and fretted about how to handle his questions. My heart started to pound faster, not because of the hill we were climbing but because I knew God was prompting me to say something. It seemed clear that she was grasping for a plan to navigate these uncharted waters of parenting.

After she finished sharing, she looked to her friend and me and asked, “So, how do you guys handle the whole topic of sex with your kids? I feel like it’s just opening a big can of worms.”

Her friend grimaced before answering. “I just avoid it and change the subject. It’s so awkward.”

I breathed a prayer and chimed in with a different perspective. “Well, my husband and I started talking about sex with our boys when they were pretty little. We knew by talking about it with them when they were so young would make it less awkward when they were older. Plus, it would enable us to be the first ones to share information with them, so we could begin to shape their views about sexuality. We wanted them to see us as credible sources of information so they wouldn’t be embarrassed asking us questions.”

Both women looked surprised and stared at me wide-eyed. Finally, one responded, “Seriously? You started talking about it with them before they were even asking about it? Wasn’t it awkward? Weren’t you embarrassed?”

We continued walking as I shared about the different resources we’d used to guide our conversations. I explained that talking about sex with our kids happened in short snippets over time. We had an open dialogue so that we could address issues and questions in age-appropriate ways rather than having “the talk” that people dread so much. We wanted to give them time to absorb information little by little so that they could build on their knowledge base.

When the hike ended, one of the women asked for more information on where to find resources, which I gladly shared. As I drove home, I started thinking about the paradox in our society regarding sex. Our culture is saturated with it. Even when we’re not seeking it, we’re continually bombarded with magazine covers, TV shows, music and billboards with overt or subtle messages about sex. Our kids are learning about it all the time through their exposure to popular culture. And yet, for as sex-obsessed as our western society seems to be, most parents dread educating their kids and having frank conversations about how to handle their sexuality as they mature.

For followers of Jesus, we should know better. If we’re not actively engaging in shaping our kids’ sexual identities, we are letting the world do it for us. What they’re learning is completely contrary to God’s plan.

First and foremost, we need to have a clear understanding of what the Bible teaches about sex. Before we can talk with our kids, we need to know and embrace God’s boundaries for it. A quick glance at any concordance reveals that the Bible has much to say on the topic. Here is one passage from the many choices:

“It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong or take advantage of a brother or sister. The Lord will punish all those who commit such sins, as we told you and warned you before. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore, anyone who rejects this instruction does not reject a human being but God, the very God who gives you his Holy Spirit.” (1 Thessalonians 4:3-8, NIV)

In case we need further clarification about God’s plan for sex, the book of Hebrews emphasizes that God intends it for marriage alone.

“Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.” (Hebrews 13:4, NIV)

We cannot allow our culture to influence our kids with the idea that the Bible’s teaching about sex is outdated or irrelevant. It may surprise you to learn that when Paul wrote to the Thessalonians they were living in a sex-saturated culture. In her session five video in the Children of the Day study, Beth Moore shared information about how people viewed sex in Thessalonica during the time of Paul’s ministry there. I looked up the commentary she referenced and found this description:

“In antiquity, ethics was the domain of the philosophers and not of the gods. Normally religion did not have anything to do with the moral-ity of the worshipers. In fact, a number of cults promoted a lifestyle that would have been viewed as immoral from a Christian perspective. Dio-nysus, the god of wine and drunkenness, is depicted in reliefs, statues, and mosaics with a vine and grapes laced through his hair and a down- turned empty cup in his hand, a symbol of drunkenness…The god promoted drinking wine and encouraged this solitary so-ber man to seek the sexual pleasures Aphrodite brings. Aphrodite was herself the symbol of sexual license and the patroness of the prostitutes.”*

For Christians, maintaining sexual purity then was as difficult as it is now. Despite this, we must not forget that God created sex. He is not trying to take away our fun by placing clear boundaries around what is and is not part of His plan. He wants what is best for us, not what is easiest. Helping our children to understand this when they are young enables them to enter the teen years with a clear sense that God has something better for them than casual sex with random people. It protects them from the lifelong scars that come from being sexually active in each new relationship they enter before marriage. We are setting them up for a much healthier view of their sexuality than the world offers. Giving them clear explanations also helps them resolve to wait for covenant relationships with their future husbands or wives. Praying for them helps too.

My hiking partner was right in one way: teaching our kids about sex is a lot like opening a can of worms. It can be messy and complicated trying to deal with that tangled and writhing mass of topics that make us squirm. But when we control the can opener and the pace of emptying the can, we get to take out one worm at a time to examine it carefully. It’s a lot less overwhelming that way.

Maybe you’re open to the idea of talking with your kids about sex, but you don’t know how or where to start. First, pray that God will give you wisdom, calm your nerves, remove the awkwardness and provide good opportunities to begin the dialogue. From my experience, I found it’s best to set aside time intentionally with one child at a time. Here are a few resources that you also might find helpful:

-Christian author and speaker Maryflo Ridley was the first person who helped me understand the importance of teaching our kids and shaping their sexual identities while they were still young. Her website has a host of great resources:

http://maryflo.org/#&panel1-3

Books:

-For parents of kids from Kindergarten through middle school the God’s Design for Sex book series by Stan and Brenna Jones is a great jumping off place. It has age appropriate books to read with your kids at different stages in their development (the first one is for ages 5-8 and they go up from there)

-For parents of elementary age kids:

The Squire and the Scroll: A Tale of the Rewards of a Pure Heart by Jennie Bishop is a great book to build a foundation in your kids that values purity. It doesn’t discuss sex specifically, but lays a foundation for future conversations.

-For parents of middle school and high school aged kids:

Five Conversations You Must Have with Your Daughter by Vicki Courtney

Five Conversations You Must have with Your Son by Vicki Courtney

And the Bride Wore White by Dannah K. Gresh

Raising a Modern Day Knight by Robert Lewis (this book is more about what true manhood is, but the principles in it connect to how to treat women and sexuality)

-Other Websites for parents of teenagers:

http://vickicourtney.com

http://www.virtuousreality.com

If you need a little courage to begin this journey, click on the link to hear Shane Harper’s song “Hold You Up.”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v-iM3SveuVw

Moore, Beth; Children of the Day; 2014; Lifeway Press; http://www.lifeway.com

*The Pillar New Testament Commentary: The Letters to the THESSALONIANS, GENE L. GREEN, © 2002 Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing copied from http://www.wtsbooks.com/common/pdf_links/9780802837387.pdf

The Pros and Cons of “More”

Not all of these issues have black and white answers–just like my son’s view on the quantity of his Legos differs from mine. The Bible is one of the best places to find clear answers. Determining if you have more of something than you should is between you and God.

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Crossing the floor of my younger son’s bedroom sometimes feels like navigating my way through a bed of nails. When he is deep into his creative mode, colorful plastic Legos with hard edges and sharp corners cover his carpet. He can sit for hours surrounded by a pile of his favorite building materials. Vehicles, skyscrapers, spaceships and mini figures have overtaken much of the real estate on his bedroom floor. Although I often point out that he has more than enough, requests for new Lego sets regularly appear on his birthday and Christmas wish lists. He sighs at my lack of understanding when I use words like “gluttony” or “hoarding” to describe his obsession with Legos. It’s a good-natured disagreement over a fairly minor issue.   He thinks he needs more and I think he has more than he needs.

It turns out the Bible has quite a bit to say about the concept of “more” but the issues have much higher stakes. Sometimes abundance is positive, as we see when Paul, Silas and Timothy urge the Thessalonians to please God and to love one another more and more:

“As for other matters, brothers and sisters, we instructed you how to live in order to please God, as in fact you are living. Now we ask you and urge you in the Lord Jesus to do this more and more…  Now about your love for one another we do not need to write to you, for you yourselves have been taught by God to love each other. And in fact, you do love all of God’s family throughout Macedonia. Yet we urge you, brothers and sisters, to do so more and more.” (1 Thessalonians 4:1,9-10, NIV, bold print added)

There are other times, however, when Scripture shows “more” as not necessarily positive:

-Hatred: “Joseph had a dream, and when he told it to his brothers, they hated him all the more.” (Genesis 37:5, NIV, bold print added)

-Corruption: “But when the judge died, the people returned to ways even more corrupt than those of their ancestors, following other gods and serving and worshiping them. They refused to give up their evil practices and stubborn ways. (Judges 2:19, NIV, bold print added)

-Fear: “Saul became still more afraid of him, and he remained his enemy the rest of his days.” (1 Samuel 18:29, NIV, bold print added)

-Sinful Behavior: “Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more.” (Ephesians 4:19, NIV, bold print added)

Beth Moore explains the tension between positive and negative abundance in our lives: “Something is going to grow. Something will get ‘more’ of us. Will it be hatred? Coldness? Addiction? Sensuality? Perversion? Devotion? Affection? Belief? Blessing? Ask yourself this question as I do the same: knowing the propensity of things to grow, which way do I want to go? ‘More and more’ one direction will force its antithesis into ‘less and less.’ We get to decide which we want to feed and which we want to starve.” (Children of the Day, p. 93)

Sometimes it’s wise and healthy to take a step back and evaluate the things in our lives that are influencing us “more and more.” Use the questions below to consider how each area impacts what grows “more and more” in our lives:

The company we keep:

-Are our typical activities and topics of conversation honoring to God?

-Does alcohol play a prominent role in our times together and would we still have fun without it?

-How are our personal attitudes and outlooks affected after spending time together?

-Are our worldly friends rubbing off on us more or is our Christian faith rubbing off on them more?

The social and extracurricular activities in which our families participate:

-How do they impact our schedules and ability to have healthy time margins?

-Does involvement in them still make it possible to go to church and be involved in Christian community?

-Are they defining our self-worth or our children’s self-worth?

-Are they bringing out the best in our families or making us more prone to comparison and unhealthy competition?

The entertainment we enjoy:

-Do the movies, TV shows, magazines, books, websites, social media, blogs, games and other past times we like influence us more toward worldly viewpoints or godly ones?

-Do we make time for entertainment, but struggle to find time to spend with God daily?

The material things we acquire:

-Do we talk about, look at and shop for material things continually?

-Are there any material things that have captured our attention and become the central focus of our lives?

-Are we willing to make needed changes when we recognize that material objects are mattering to us “more and more”?

The personal comfort we crave:

-Do we spend a significant amount of time arranging for and focusing on our own personal comfort?

-Is an emphasis on our physical, emotional and relational comfort causing us to become self-centered?

-Is being comfortable more important than letting God stretch us in new ways?

Finding a healthy balance with these things is a lifelong endeavor that requires constant prayer and vigilance. Not all of these issues have black and white answers–just like my son’s view on the quantity of his Legos differs from mine. The Bible is one of the best places to find clear answers.  Determining if you have more of something than you should is between you and God.

If you’re feeling convicted after reading through the questions and consulting Scripture, do not be discouraged. This is a great step toward healthy growth and shows that you have a teachable heart. God is ready and waiting to help you when you admit your struggle to Him. In addition to praying, you may need to ask for help from a wise friend, counselor or pastor.   There is no need for guilt or personal condemnation.   God’s Word promises us: “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning.” (Lamentations 3:22-23a, NIV)

The good news is that there are things that we can pursue “more and more” without worrying about negative effects:

The Bible: The more we study it, the more we can be amazed by how God’s truth is woven together from start to finish. The more we learn, the hungrier we become to know more.

Prayer: The more we lay at the feet of God, the more we see Him working in our lives. This leads to more trust in God and more peace in all circumstances.

Jesus:  The more time we spend with Him, the more He reveals Himself to us and the deeper our relationship with Him grows.

The Holy Spirit: The more we ask Him to fill us, the more He gives us wisdom and enables us to impact the lives of others.

Christian Music: The more we listen to Christian music, the more we’re drawn to the heart of God and to seeing the world through a biblical lens.

A Godly Perspective on our Time and Finances: The more we see our time and money as belonging to God, the more willing we are to put aside our personal agendas in order to pursue Him, give generously and serve others to further His kingdom.

For more inspiration, click on the link to hear Colton Dixon’s song “More of You.” Make it your prayer as you listen.

(quote from Moore, Beth; Children of the Day; 2014; Lifeway Press; http://www.lifeway.com)

Taking the Hindrance Out of Our Hurt

Rather than letting hindrances and the hurt that often accompanies them shut us down, we can use them to grow in our spiritual maturity and ability to be used by God.

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The yellow ball bobbed in the water as my son swam behind it, pushing it forward with urgency as he sprinted the length of the pool. A player from the opposing water polo team was closing in on him fast. Suddenly, my boy’s body jerked to a stop and he appeared to be swimming in place. His opponent had reached out underwater and grabbed his ankle, pulling him backwards to keep him from getting any closer to the goal. I stared wide-eyed and turned to my husband, “Are they allowed to do that?”

He smirked before answering. “Well, not exactly, but sometimes it’s better to get a foul than to let someone shoot on the goal.”

Water polo, it turns out, is all about the teams creating hindrances for one another. I’ve often sat in the stands wincing as I watch one player put a hand on the shoulder of his opponent and hold his other hand high in the air, attempting to hinder him from scoring or passing to a team mate. I wouldn’t last five minutes, but my son seems to be energized by that kind of opposition. I’m amazed as I watch him pivot his body to swim around an opponent and drive toward the goal. For water polo players, moving past the hindrances seems to make a shot into the cage even more satisfying.

Could the same satisfaction come from getting around our own hindrances for God’s glory? If you’ve been doing Beth Moore’s study on 1 & 2 Thessalonians, you already know the answer is “yes.” She discusses several hindrances Paul identifies that can impede us from moving forward in our faith.

“14 For you, brothers, became imitators of the churches of God in Christ Jesus that are in Judea. For you suffered the same things from your own countrymen as they did from the Jews, 15 who killed both the Lord Jesus and the prophets, and drove us out, and displease God and oppose all mankind 16 by hindering us from speaking to the Gentiles that they might be saved—so as always to fill up the measure of their sins. But wrath has come upon them at last! 17 But since we were torn away from you, brothers, for a short time, in person not in heart, we endeavored the more eagerly and with great desire to see you face to face, 18 because we wanted to come to you—I, Paul, again and again—but Satan hindered us.” (1 Thessalonians 2:14-18, italics added, ESV)

Beth explains: “According to 1 Thessalonians 2:14-20, both people and Satan had authentically been successful at hindering Paul. But that’s just it. He kept pressing forward and refused to let the hindrance itself become a hindrance. He kept his squinting eyes on the goal. He didn’t get furious with God over all that had been permitted in his path or demand to know why God would make His will so utterly impossible to fulfill. He just stayed at it. He believed. He persevered” (Children of the Day, p. 70.)

In water polo, coaches use two terms as they shout directions to the players. During defensive plays, they’ll yell “press” when they want defenders to put pressure on offenders. The opposing players jostle in pairs, each trying to gain the advantage.   During offensive plays, coaches yell “drive,” spurring players to move toward open water and to find a position near the goal to score. Good players don’t let up on either one of these things. They press until they avert a goal and they drive until they score one.

Perhaps we can borrow some of their strategies when faced with our own hindrances in the spiritual realm. Rather than letting hindrances and the hurt that often accompanies them shut us down, we can use them to grow in our spiritual maturity and ability to be used by God. “What if, instead of fixating on taking the hurt out of our hindrance, we prayed for God to take the hindrance out of our hurt?” (Children of the Day p. 70)

Beth lists several “equations” to illustrate her idea. A few that resonated with me were:

Heartbreak – hindrance = depth

Disappointment – hindrance = faith

My pain – hindrance = my passion

I even added a few of my own to the list:

Insecurity – hindrance = authenticity

Self-consciousness – hindrance = sensitivity to others

Any hindrance we’ve experienced provides an opportunity for God’s transformation in our lives. When we lay them at His feet, He uses them to bless others. Consider Paul’s words: “3 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. 5 For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ.” (2 Corinthians 1:3-5, NIV)

When we give God our hindrances, He matures us even as He heals and comforts us. The ways we learn and grow enable us to become a blessing for others facing similar challenges. In the process we are reminded that we are beloved children of the Almighty God, Who is hindered by nothing.

Click on the link below to watch Jason Gray’s music video “Remind Me Who I Am.” It provides some great visuals to help you remember that our hindrances do not define us. After watching, add your own equation to the comments section below and share the hindrance you need to relinquish to God so He can use your hurt for His glory.

Your Hurt- Your Hindrance = Your Opportunity to Impact Others and Glorify God.

(Moore, Beth; Children of the Day; 2014; Lifeway Press; http://www.lifeway.com)

The Fallacy of the “Epic Fail”

Don’t let Satan deceive you with the sting of a past “failure” or the fear of a future one. Instead, adopt Paul’s attitude and reject the idea of the “epic fail.” If your motivation is pure and your goal is to please God, you will be a success every time, regardless of what the world sees.

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From the moment I heard the phrase “epic fail,” I chose not to make it part of my vocabulary.   It seemed like everywhere I turned, I would hear people jokingly say “epic fail” to describe anything from burnt toast to a catastrophic train accident. This type of phrase, known as a “meme” (rhymes with “team”), is a cultural symbol or social idea that transmits quickly from person to person and becomes part of the fabric of our language and culture.

The first time my husband and I heard our boys say it, we added it to the list of “banned words” for our household. We didn’t want our boys over-using such a negative and exaggerated phrase to label mistakes, whether they were theirs or someone else’s. If they viewed every mistake as an “epic fail,” we thought they’d be less likely to stretch themselves to try new things.   Failure and mistakes are valuable tools for learning and we didn’t want them emphasized in such a negative way. Over-inflated descriptions like that have a way of defining us, even when they’re said in a joking manner.

When I read Beth Moore’s comments about the word “failure” in Children of the Day, the choice we’d made to ban the term was reaffirmed. She says: “Satan loves to fuel our feelings of failure. Just when we finally muster the courage to act or take a stand for the gospel, he prompts us to believe we blew it. Our feelings of failure can start an ongoing cycle of inadequacy: If we feel like failures, we’ll act like failures and, if we let that condemnation go unchecked, we’ll make our next decision out of the same perceived defeat” (Children of the Day, p. 41).

The Apostle Paul rejected the idea of failure and encouraged the Thessalonians to do the same. Acts 17:1-9 describes his visit to Thessalonica with Silas and Timothy and the riot that started as a result of his teaching. Their visit to Thessalonica ended with the three men fleeing the city at nightfall, leaving the new believers behind to deal with the mess. Still, in his letter to the Thessalonians, Paul says:

“You know, brothers, that our visit to you was not a failure.   We had previously suffered and been insulted in Philippi, as you know, but with the help of our God we dared to tell you his gospel in spite of strong opposition. For the appeal we make does not spring from error or impure motives, nor are we trying to trick you. On the contrary, we speak as men approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel. We are not trying to please men but God, who tests our hearts. You know we never used flattery, nor did we put on a mask to cover up greed—God is our witness. We were not looking for praise from men, not from you or anyone else” (1 Thessalonians 2:1-6a, NIV).

Paul did not view their efforts in Thessalonica as a failure because regardless of the outcome, he knew that he, Silas and Timothy pleased God by sharing the gospel with pure motives. They didn’t try to put a positive spin on a bad situation; they simply didn’t see it as a failure in any way.

How I wish I could say the same of myself. I’ve often let my perceived failures hinder me from moving forward with something that God is calling me to do. Once my feelings get hurt or my ego is injured, I’m tempted to sit on the sidelines and nurse my injuries instead of getting back into the game and trying again.

I’ve dealt with this repeatedly over the last few years as I’ve been growing and learning as a writer. It can be frightening to share a piece I’ve written and to ask for constructive feedback. Sometimes the observations people make sting. A few times I’ve even been brought to tears and have wanted to give up. However, I’ve begun to embrace those constructive comments and harsh words as opportunities to continue improving. I’m beginning to see my mistakes as tools to teach me. Since the ultimate goal of my writing is to encourage, inspire and challenge people in their faith, I want it to be the best it can be. This means learning from my mistakes and pressing on rather than letting them define me. My prayer is that, like Paul, my focus is not on pleasing my readers, but pleasing God.

When our efforts don’t look successful from a worldly perspective, it’s important to remember that: “Christ’s economy completely redefines failure…We can’t let Satan shut us in or he wins the battle. He’s trying to make wound-lickers out of warriors. When God opens the door again, let’s stand back up, brush ourselves off, and step through it” (Children of the Day, p. 42).

Paul reminds us of the power we can access through Jesus: “I can do all this through him who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:13, NIV). Don’t let Satan deceive you with the sting of a past “failure” or the fear of a future one. Instead, adopt Paul’s attitude and reject the idea of the “epic fail.” If your motivation is pure and your goal is to please God, you will be a success every time, regardless of what the world sees.

The band MercyMe has a fantastic song out right now about rejecting the label of “failure.” Click on the link and be inspired by the catchy tune of “Greater.”

(Moore, Beth; Children of the Day; 2014; Lifeway Press; http://www.lifeway.com)

(For more information about memes, you can visit: http://netforbeginners.about.com/od/weirdwebculture/f/What-Is-an-Internet-Meme.htm)