Category: Christian Goodbyes

The Feast of the Lamb

Touching down on the runway, I switched on my phone as the plane taxied to the gate. My mind buzzed with excitement anticipating the weekend of wedding festivities that lay ahead. As we jolted to a stop, I glanced at a text message I’d received mid-flight and my stomach lurched: a close friend’s father had passed away earlier that morning and her husband had reached out to share the news. Stunned, I froze for a moment before burying my face in my hands as tears began flowing. Though I ached for my friend’s loss, I also rejoiced that her father was no longer suffering from a debilitating disease. The news triggered a surprising wave of personal grief as memories of losing my own dad surfaced. Wiping my eyes and taking a deep breath, I gathered my things as we prepared to exit the plane.

After a phone call with my friend, I pushed the pause button on my emotions and changed gears. We’d flown halfway across the country to gather with extended family for a happy reason—the wedding of our nephew. Over two action packed days, we spent time connecting with family members and old friends to celebrate the marriage of a man and woman who loved Jesus and one another deeply. Standing under massive shade trees bordering a meadow dotted with wildflowers, we watched as our beaming nephew awaited his radiant bride. Although the surroundings were picturesque, what caught my attention most was the deep joy that permeated the wedding. It was clear that these two had been covered in prayer throughout their lives. Both sets of parents had prayed fervently for the Lord to lead their children to godly spouses who would complement them perfectly. Their marriage was starting on a firm foundation and the wedding celebration was evidence of God’s faithful provision.

Scanning the crowd during the reception, I marveled at the many meaningful connections there were between the guests. With so many godly and faithful people there, the overlaps in ministry and friendship were plentiful. I loved reconnecting with a mentor I hadn’t seen since college and was thrilled to meet people with common connections to friends and ministries I’d served with in the past. It was an amazing array of faith-filled people and felt like a foretaste of the great wedding feast prophesied by John in the Bible:

 “Then a voice came from the throne, saying: ‘Praise our God, all you his servants, you who fear him, both great and small!’ Then I heard what sounded like a great multitude, like the roar of rushing waters and like loud peals of thunder, shouting:

‘Hallelujah! For our Lord God Almighty reigns. Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory! For the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready. Fine linen, bright and clean was given her to wear.’ (Fine linen stands for the righteous acts of God’s holy people.)

Then the angel said to me, ‘Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the wedding supper of the Lamb!’ And he added, ‘These are the true words of God.’” (Revelation 19:5-9, NIV)

If you’re unfamiliar with this passage, it’s describing the celebration that will occur after the final judgement: “God’s people are arrayed in fine linen, clean and white because Christ’s shed blood has washed away their sins. They are presented righteous and pure to their bridegroom, Christ. At the marriage supper, individual believers are guests, but collectively they are the bride.”* This links to many passages where Scripture uses a groom and his bride as a picture of God and His people in the Old Testament and Christ and the Church in the New Testament (most notably in Ephesians 5:22-32).

This brings me to an unlikely comparison– I felt the same deep joy that characterized my nephew’s wedding a few weeks later at the memorial service for my friend’s dad. Once again, people gathered to celebrate, only this time it was for the life of a man who met Jesus as a young dad and followed Him passionately for the next four and a half decades. Throughout the service, we heard stories about his love for the Lord and how it informed every aspect of his life in his home, his leisure time, and his career. A lump formed in my throat trying to sing the words to “How Great Thou Art” and “Amazing Grace.” It was overwhelming to worship the God who had used this gifted, yet humble, man to love and serve so many. 

Sitting at the service surrounded by old friends once again made me think about the great wedding feast of the Lamb. I’ve learned to savor those sweet moments at weddings and funerals when we get to pause, reflect, and recognize God’s goodness. There was a deep fulfillment in celebrating with others who faithfully followed Jesus and who were intent on seeing His kingdom advance on earth. Over time I’ve discovered that a significant bond connects those who walk the narrow path that leads to life described in Matthew 7:13-14. 

I realized both events gave a glimpse of what’s ahead for all who call Jesus Lord and Savior. One day all believers will gather at the Feast of the Lamb to worship Jesus together. I can only imagine the many joy-filled reunions between old friends and family members that will take place.  After years of following Him, we’ll see Jesus face to face and revel in His glory and grace collectively. 

As I reflect on those recent celebrations, I can’t help but think of people attending who couldn’t fully comprehend or appreciate what was taking place because they didn’t know Jesus. They were unable to access the spiritual significance or marvel at God’s faithfulness like the rest of us. They couldn’t recognize the Lord’s amazing handiwork because they had no context for it. My heart should ache for them more than it does. My prayer is that the Holy Spirit will prompt me to sow seeds of faith liberally in the lives of others in hopes that they recognize and receive God’s tremendous love. 

Kristian Stanfill’s song “Even So Come” paints an inspiring picture of waiting faithfully for our Bridegroom to return. As you listen, imagine the joyful reunion you’ll experience with Jesus one day, then go and share it with someone else so they can be a part of it too.

*Halley’s Bible Handbook, Zondervan, 2000, p. 958 

Advance Part 5: Making Your Hardship Serve the Gospel

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Last summer one of my closest friends from high school passed away after battling cancer. If you’ve been following this blog for a while, you may recall a post I wrote about her last days called “Christians Never Have to Say Goodbye.”

I couldn’t help thinking about Kristi and her family as I heard Beth Moore share the final point of her ADVANCE acrostic:

E– Everything is redeemed if it serves the gospel

Beth’s main point was that we have the choice to use our hardships to advance the gospel and spread God’s kingdom on earth. I watched Kristi’s husband do this over the course of her brutal cancer treatments and her last days before going home to heaven. His regular posts on Caring Bridge not only updated friends and family about Kristi’s health condition, they also shared his faith journey with authenticity and boldness. It was impossible to read through a post without being pointed to the person of Jesus and to be reminded that true hope is found only in Him.

My friend’s husband exemplifies the idea of submitting something awful for the sake of the gospel. In the past year he has continued to write about his journey as he’s sorted through the grief of losing his wife and raising their four kids. He doesn’t sugar coat life as a single parent with sunny platitudes, but he does share the hope he continues to find through faith in Jesus.  Countless lives around the globe continue to be impacted by the truth he shares.

The Apostle Paul did something similar throughout his ministry. He took hardships he endured and used them to advance the gospel. Rather than focusing only on his “target audience,” he viewed anyone in his path as a perfect candidate for hearing the good news of Jesus. Even his guards and fellow inmates in prison benefitted from being near him. He rejoiced at the opportunity to share with these captive audiences.

“Now I want you to know, brothers and sisters, that what has happened to me has actually served to advance the gospel. As a result, it has become clear throughout the whole palace guard and to everyone else that I am in chains for Christ” (Philippians 1:12-13).

In some cases, Paul’s faith was so evident in the midst of hardships that others were drawn to him even when he wasn’t focusing on them specifically:

“After they had been severely flogged, they were thrown into prison, and the jailer was commanded to guard them carefully. When he received these orders, he put them in the inner cell and fastened their feet in the stocks.

About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them. Suddenly there was such a violent earthquake that the foundations of the prison were shaken. At once all the prison doors flew open, and everyone’s chains came loose. The jailer woke up, and when he saw the prison doors open, he drew his sword and was about to kill himself because he thought the prisoners had escaped. But Paul shouted, ‘Don’t harm yourself! We are all here!’

The jailer called for lights, rushed in and fell trembling before Paul and Silas. He then brought them out and asked, ‘Sirs, what must I do to be saved?’

They replied, ‘Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved—you and your household.’ Then they spoke the word of the Lord to him and to all the others in his house. At that hour of the night the jailer took them and washed their wounds; then immediately he and all his household were baptized. The jailer brought them into his house and set a meal before them; he was filled with joy because he had come to believe in God—he and his whole household” (Acts 16:23-34).

Here are few thoughts based on these passages and Beth Moore’s teaching:

-We don’t always get to pick our circumstances, but we can choose how to respond to them

-We can trust God in the midst of a hardship and ask Him to reveal Himself and use it to advance His kingdom

-We can’t put boundaries around with whom, where or when we share the gospel; our “target audience” is anyone God puts in our path.

-When our focus is on God and we spend time with Him, our faith will naturally overflow to impact others

-It is biblical and honoring to God when we focus on Him in the midst of our hardships; this pleases Him and gives hope to others

I’m aware that these things are easy to write about, but much more challenging to put into practice. Still, what do you have to lose by praying a simple prayer like this: “God, use the hardship I’m facing right now to advance the gospel”?  Ask God to draw your attention to the ways He’s inviting you to advance the gospel in the midst of your difficulties.

Writing about Beth Moore’s teaching from the Living Proof Live event I attended has made it sink in so much more. I hope it’s been a blessing in your life and has inspired you while giving you practical tools to advance the gospel.

Here is the acrostic in its entirety:

A- A kingdom is coming

D- Dare to advance it

V- Vie fiercely in prayer

A- Add traction to your action

N- Never take a “no” from the devil

C- Cease the policing and the pacing

E- Everything is redeemed if it serves the gospel

*Special note to those planning to join Focused Living at CPC this fall: If you enjoyed reading about Paul and Silas in the Acts passage above, you are going to love our first study this fall on 1 & 2 Thessalonians by Beth Moore called Children of the Day.

If you’d like a great example of someone who is using his hardship to serve the gospel, visit Kristi’s husband’s blog at the link below.

http://www.bgoneb9bhealed.com/blog/

If you’re in the midst of a hardship right now, click on the link and be encouraged by Casting Crowns’ song “Praise You in the Storm”

Christians Never Have to Say Goodbye

Kristi and Marybeth Inverness '91

Kristi and me in Inverness, Scotland 1991

I wrote a blog about heaven this past December called “Traveling Light with and Eye Towards Home.”  In it, I recounted the story of backpacking in Europe with my friend, Kristi.  What I didn’t mention in that posting was that Kristi was in remission after a nine-month battle with breast cancer.  We didn’t know that it was only a temporary reprieve.  The cancer returned with a vengeance in March of this year.  I had no idea that my blog on heaven would become so relevant so soon.

As Kristi’s health declined, I longed to see her face-to-face and prayed God would show me the right timing to make a trip to her home in Texas.   We’d talked, texted and e-mailed regularly throughout her illness, but it just wasn’t the same as being with her.  At the end of April the timing was right and after getting the green light from Kristi and her husband, I booked a flight to Austin.  Traveling alone, I had some good time to prepare myself emotionally and spiritually.  I also had a number of friends and family supporting me with prayer at home.  I asked God to use me to bless and encourage Kristi and her family.  I was anxious about seeing my spunky friend sick and wondering how the weekend would go.

When I finally arrived at her house, Kristi greeted me warmly and maneuvered across the room to give me a hug. She wore a headscarf and gingerly pushed a walker but her broad smile and cheerful spirit remained intact.  In fact, I was amazed at the amount of things we did over the course of the weekend considering Kristi’s frailty.   Her family was bound and determined to give me a full “Lone Star State Experience” when they found out I’d never been there before.  So, in spite of going to give them help, I got a big dose of Texas hospitality in return.

On Saturday morning I sat with Kristi at a hometown parade watching three of her four kids smiling and waving from one of the floats.  Afterwards, I experienced my first Texas thunderstorm- a two-hour deluge unlike anything we have in California.   I spent a quiet afternoon organizing Tupperware in the kitchen after painting Kristi’s toenails metallic blue (she was in desperate need of a pedicure).  While she was resting, her 6 year-old son appeared in the doorway dressed as Captain America and glumly declared “I’m bored.” As any mom would, I countered “How about showing me some of your toys?”  Thanks to my boys, I knew a thing or two about comic book heroes and Lego mini figures, which earned me serious status as I sat playing with him.  That evening I tasted my first “Texas Barbeque” without a plate or utensils at Rudy’s (a combination of a restaurant and gas station).

Sunday morning I was in charge of loading Kristi’s wheelchair into their Suburban and driving the family to church while her husband competed in a triathlon.   Later that afternoon we attended a family reunion in an adobe house that was over 100 years old.   It was a fun and busy weekend filled with moments of laughter and light-heartedness- definitely not what I was anticipating.

On Sunday morning after church, Kristi and I had a rare moment alone at the house.  Feeling prompted by the Holy Spirit, I asked if I could share Psalm 34 with her, which I’d read in Jesus Calling earlier that morning.  It seemed to fit her circumstances perfectly (funny how the Bible does that…):

“I will extol the Lord at all times;
 his praise will always be on my lips.

I will glory in the Lord; let the afflicted hear and rejoice.

Glorify the Lord with me; let us exalt his name together.

I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears.

Those who look to him are radiant;
their faces are never covered with shame.

This poor man called, and the Lord heard him; he saved him out of all his troubles.

The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him,
and he delivers them.

Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the one who takes refuge in him.

Fear the Lord, you his holy people, for those who fear him lack nothing.

The lions may grow weak and hungry, but those who seek the Lord lack no good thing…The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them; he delivers them from all their troubles.  The Lord is close to the brokenhearted 
and saves those who are crushed in spirit”  (Verses 1-10, 17-18).

Later, before leaving for the airport, I found another quiet moment with Kristi and her husband.  It was a blessing and privilege it was to lay hands on them to pray after being apart for the duration of her battle with cancer.  I left feeling at peace, so glad for the time we’d spent together and not entirely sure it was the last time I’d see Kristi in this life.  It seemed like she still had a lot of fight left in he and the family had definitely not given up hope.

As school let out in June, I received word that Kristi’s cancer was spreading and her doctors had run out of viable options for her. I was so glad I’d traveled to see her, but felt I had one more thing to do that I’d been avoiding.  So, I sat at the computer one afternoon and wrote Kristi a letter.  I’d been overwhelmed thinking of how to sum up a friendship that began when we were in 8th grade and spanned so many years.  We’d experienced so much of life together, how could I capture that in a few pages?  With the Holy Spirit guiding me, I wrote a simple letter and sent it with a CD of songs to encourage Kristi and her family.   Here is an excerpt from that letter:

In spite of all these milestone moments we’ve shared, I think the one that means the most to me happened over the course of summer and fall in 1988.  Newly graduated from high school, we both launched in different directions with the same purpose:  working at Christian camps to serve, grow and (of course) have fun.   Working at Houseboats was transformational to my faith and my life choices.  I remember coming home so excited that I finally really “got” my faith and loved God in a way I never really had before.  Returning to life and friends at home was hard and I felt like a stranger in a strange land.   Most people outside my family looked at me like I’d gone a little crazy from being around so many Christians for so long. 

The one exception to this was you.  I can remember talking to you and hearing about your experience at Redwood Camp and realizing that we had both had life-changing and faith-changing experiences that would forever alter the courses of our lives.  I can’t tell you what a relief it was for me to discover that I was not alone and that there was someone who understood the choices I was making and affirmed me for them.  A deeper bond grew between us from that day forward.  Our friendship wasn’t just based on fun times and shared memories, but on a passionate love for Jesus and a desire to follow Him with our lives.

As we headed off to college, we were both set on finding Christian friends and plugging into ministries at our new schools.  Like most of our friends, we both chose to join sororities.  Although the social scene was familiar to us, it felt a bit different now that we’d fully committed to God and were not “riding the fence” as we had in high school days. 

For me, this proved to be pretty challenging at first.  I can remember struggling to find Christian friends among my peers in the Greek System.  As a freshman, I wanted to fit in and make new friends. I called you for some encouragement and you admonished me not to fall back into the lukewarm waters of our high school years and to stand firm in my faith.  You told me it was good for me to stand out as different and pointed out that this could be a great avenue for sharing my faith with a group of people who desperately needed to hear the truth.  I can remember thinking “Wow, God has really given her a strength and conviction that are pretty amazing.”  I don’t know if I ever really told you, but that “pep talk” gave me the courage to press on, to be different and to be a light in a dark place.

If I’ve never said it before, let me say it now:  Kristi, thank you for being a voice of Truth when I needed it most.  The impact you had on me at that time made a significant difference in my life choices.  I’ll never forget your words of encouragement that day or in the days that followed.

Thank you for your partnership in the gospel for these many long years.  I rejoice knowing we will spend eternity praising Him together.

“I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers…I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”  Philippians 1:3a-6

Kristi’s husband read the letter to her on Friday, June 28th.  I’m so glad I responded to the Spirit’s prompting to write it.  On July 2, I received word that my sweet friend breathed her last with her husband at her side.  She was freed from her broken body and finally at home in heaven.

A week after receiving this news, I had a dream about Kristi.  We were having a conversation and sharing some final moments together.  I don’t remember the words, but there was a feeling of warmth and peace between us.  She was smiling, confident and reassuring.   Moments later I awoke in the dark and realized I wasn’t just crying in my dream, but in reality.  As I sat up to wipe away the tears and blow my nose, I felt the relief of emotional release. Adjusting to this new reality has been hard; the sadness churns in me but tears have not flowed very freely.

I am still processing this huge loss, yet there is a peace in me that is deeper still.  Kristi lived every moment pointing people to Jesus until she took her final breath.  The faith and trust she and her family showed in her last 15 months impacted countless people and opened their eyes to God’s saving grace.   He used their hard circumstances to bring about much good in their lives and the lives of many others.

I walk in confidence knowing that I will see Kristi again.  I’ll paraphrase C.S. Lewis’ sentiments from the book A Severe Mercy by Sheldon Vanauken:  Christians never have to say “Goodbye”, only, “Until we meet again.”

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Georgetown, Texas 2013