Category: Fellowship

Be Inspired This Week

Hearing the lock click in the door, I sat up in bed and squinted as light from the hallway streamed into the hotel room. Two women stepped inside, rolling their suitcases behind them. “Hi, I’m Marybeth,” I said as their silhouettes tiptoed past my bed. Surprised to find me still awake, they introduced themselves. It was an awkward albeit memorable way to meet someone for the first time. The whole day had been filled with making new friends as I’d traveled from California to Texas with a group of women from church. We had arrived in stages to attend IF:Lead in Dallas– a conference for women. Some in our group knew each other, but many were meeting for the first time. The common link between us was a shared love for Jesus.

Although the conference lasted only two days, it was loaded with inspiring worship, solid teaching, and impactful testimonies. Our group had a ball together and formed fast friendships. All of us had the same desire to share the incredible experience we’d had with others.

We returned to the Bay Area inspired and ready to begin planning IF:Danville, which would be modeled after IF:Gathering – a larger scale event happening in Dallas in the spring. In case you aren’t familiar with it, IF:Gathering was founded by author and speaker Jennie Allen. It is not only an event, but a ministry impacting people world-wide. Their goal is to put resources in the hands of women in the church to empower them to change lives. 

The group that had attended IF:Lead got busy planning a local gathering. Over time, other friends jumped into the mix to help with organizing different aspects of IF:Danville. Each time we met to plan and pray, enthusiasm for the event gained momentum.

In February, we watched a simulcast of IF:Gathering in Texas and prayerfully chose the talks that would most resonate with our local women. Soon, the programming details fell into place. To make the video teachings more relevant, we asked women in our community to share their personal experiences with Jesus. We thought interviewing them would help others see how personal faith impacts daily life in relatable and practical ways.

The number of hours lovingly poured into preparations for this event was staggering.  All of us couldn’t wait to see how God would inspire those who attended the event in mid-March. Although we were aware there was an unusual virus spreading rapidly around the world, we never dreamed it would impact our plans. It wasn’t until the final days leading up to IF:Danville that the threat of COVID-19 became personal.

I’ll never forget walking into the chapel the morning of March 11 for our final prayer time. The giddy excitement of the previous meetings had been replaced by a somber tone. With a heavy heart, our Women’s Ministries pastor shared the news that our event needed to be postponed indefinitely. County health officials had just announced gatherings over 50 people had to be suspended. Church services, Bible studies, youth groups, and mission trips were all being put on hold.

After hearing the news and shedding a few tears, we prayed together on our knees in the chapel. Despite our deep disappointment, we told God we trusted Him. We believed He’d show us what to do. At a time when people needed hope, we had it ready to share– it was just a matter of figuring out how to do it.

Over time, the Lord revealed a plan. With a bit of creativity and the blessing of technology, we were able to re-format the event to be shown online. So, I’m thrilled to announce this Thursday evening, May 14, will kick off the first of a three week series we’re calling IF:Danville at Home. Now we have the capacity to reach far more than the 400 women we’d planned to welcome to our church on March 13 & 14. 

This week you’ll have the opportunity to hear inspiring stories about how Jesus walked with a teenage girl and a seasoned grandmother through some heartbreaking medical issues. We’ll discover how God used those hard situations to grow their faith deeper. Both will inspire you with their vision for loving others and being intentional about the legacy they’re leaving behind. You’ll also have the opportunity to hear a powerful teaching from Jada Edwards of IF:Gathering. 

The IF:Danville team has spurred on my faith over the past few months and I’m thrilled that they can do the same for you. I hope you’ll join me virtually to be inspired through the interviews and teaching this Thursday at 8pm and on May 21 & 28. And I pray they’ll point you toward the hope found only in Jesus. Be sure to invite a friend who could use some encouragement right now too. For more information, click on the link below. 

http://www.cpcdanville.org/ifdanville/

Spurring Us Onward

A feeling of anticipation pulsated through the air like an approaching electrical storm. It seemed the whole Bay Area stood poised on the brink of something momentous that October. The year was 2010 and the San Francisco Giants were headed to the World Series. It had been over 50 years since they’d won the title and a rabid fan base was ready to cheer them on to victory. It seemed impossible not to get caught up in the euphoria. 

Prior to that, I’d been a casual fan at best—content to attend a game once a season for the fun of experiencing AT & T Park with our young sons. Sometimes I’d scan the headlines in the sports section to see how the Giants fared, but I didn’t think much about them beyond that.  However, in the fall of 2010 I found myself joining the throngs that rallied around the boys in black and orange. Names of players previously unknown to me rolled off my tongue with ease. On game nights, the TV stayed on through dinner, a rarity in our household. I reveled in the fun of catch phrases like “Fear the Beard”—a reference to relief pitcher Brian Wilson’s dyed black beard. I sang along with everyone else when Ashkon Davaran re-wrote Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believing” to be an anthem for the Giants.

And, of course, I got swept up in the emotion and exuberance of watching them take home the title. I’d been spurred on by the enthusiasm that surrounded me and gleefully rode the wave to victory with them. But once the season ended, my interest waned. It had been fun while it lasted, but I didn’t stay invested in the Giants much after that. 

If you’re a fickle sports fan like me, you know this is typical behavior. But, when it comes to our spiritual lives, it’s best to maintain a more consistent commitment. I think the author of Hebrews says it well, “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another- and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” (Hebrews 10:24-25, NIV)

Depending on the translation, the term “spur on” is written in a variety of ways: “stir up,” “provoke,” “stimulate,” “motivate.”  In each case, the idea is the same–we can’t fan the flames of our faith all on our own. Let’s be honest. Life is full and busy and there are dozens of things competing for our attention. If we want to continue growing and pursuing God consistently, we’re going to need others to help us stay motivated. The author of Hebrews gives us a clear explanation of what that includes.

Love: We need other believers to remind us what biblical love is and to model how to practice it. The world likes to tell us that love always feels good, but maintaining a biblical standard for love isn’t easy. Jesus told us to love our enemies (Matthew 5:44). There’s nothing easy or fun about that. And Paul tell us, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” (1 Corinthians 13:4-7, NIV) Last time I checked, many of those qualities aren’t ones I default to naturally. I need others to keep me grounded in the truth of what love is. I bet you do too.

Good Deeds: I’m full of good intentions, but not always the best on follow through. Can you relate? Scripture tells us, “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” (Ephesians 2:10, NIV) Time spent with fellow believers spurs us on by encouraging us to make doing good works a way of life. Think about how much can be accomplished when we join with others to show God’s love on an even larger scale. Countless organizations doing good in our world began with people who took this call seriously and invited others to join them.

Not Giving Up Meeting Together & Encouraging One Another: The Christian walk isn’t meant to be a solo journey. We need community to keep us encouraged. One of my favorite words in the Bible is “fellowship,” which comes from the Greek word “koinonia.” True fellowship flows naturally when we connect with God and one another simultaneously. But we can’t experience rich relationships if we’re not spending time with fellow believers. Watching sermons online, listening to podcasts, or even engaging in online “communities” are supplements, not substitutes.  There just isn’t an equivalent alternative to face to face interactions if we want to experience deep fellowship, receive personal encouragement, and grow spiritually.

Seeing the Day Approaching: The verse concludes by reminding us that Jesus will return. We’re called to live expectantly, knowing the day will dawn when He’ll come back to reign over the earth. Here’s how Jesus explains it: “When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his glorious throne. All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats.” (Matthew 25:31-32, NIV) Notice Jesus says, “when,” not “if.”  Loving others and doing good deeds is how we build His kingdom now and prepare for His eventual return. We spur one another on because we know the end goal.

Without minimizing the reappearance of Jesus, I can’t help but think of the loyal Giants fans who watched and waited for decades to see them win a World Series. They were faithful to their team through good and bad seasons and never wavered in their support. May the same be true for us as we anticipate an event with much greater significance: the long-awaited return of our Savior. 

I’ve included three songs with this post. Choose the one that resonates most with what you’re needing right now:

Enjoy “Come to the Table” by Sidewalk Prophets if you’d like to see the value and significance of meeting together. 

Listen to “Even So Come” sung here by Chris Tomlin for encouragement about pressing on in our faith while we await Jesus.

Just for fun– if you missed the Giants Anthem in 2010 inspired by Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believing,” you can watch it here. 

The Feast of the Lamb

Touching down on the runway, I switched on my phone as the plane taxied to the gate. My mind buzzed with excitement anticipating the weekend of wedding festivities that lay ahead. As we jolted to a stop, I glanced at a text message I’d received mid-flight and my stomach lurched: a close friend’s father had passed away earlier that morning and her husband had reached out to share the news. Stunned, I froze for a moment before burying my face in my hands as tears began flowing. Though I ached for my friend’s loss, I also rejoiced that her father was no longer suffering from a debilitating disease. The news triggered a surprising wave of personal grief as memories of losing my own dad surfaced. Wiping my eyes and taking a deep breath, I gathered my things as we prepared to exit the plane.

After a phone call with my friend, I pushed the pause button on my emotions and changed gears. We’d flown halfway across the country to gather with extended family for a happy reason—the wedding of our nephew. Over two action packed days, we spent time connecting with family members and old friends to celebrate the marriage of a man and woman who loved Jesus and one another deeply. Standing under massive shade trees bordering a meadow dotted with wildflowers, we watched as our beaming nephew awaited his radiant bride. Although the surroundings were picturesque, what caught my attention most was the deep joy that permeated the wedding. It was clear that these two had been covered in prayer throughout their lives. Both sets of parents had prayed fervently for the Lord to lead their children to godly spouses who would complement them perfectly. Their marriage was starting on a firm foundation and the wedding celebration was evidence of God’s faithful provision.

Scanning the crowd during the reception, I marveled at the many meaningful connections there were between the guests. With so many godly and faithful people there, the overlaps in ministry and friendship were plentiful. I loved reconnecting with a mentor I hadn’t seen since college and was thrilled to meet people with common connections to friends and ministries I’d served with in the past. It was an amazing array of faith-filled people and felt like a foretaste of the great wedding feast prophesied by John in the Bible:

 “Then a voice came from the throne, saying: ‘Praise our God, all you his servants, you who fear him, both great and small!’ Then I heard what sounded like a great multitude, like the roar of rushing waters and like loud peals of thunder, shouting:

‘Hallelujah! For our Lord God Almighty reigns. Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory! For the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready. Fine linen, bright and clean was given her to wear.’ (Fine linen stands for the righteous acts of God’s holy people.)

Then the angel said to me, ‘Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the wedding supper of the Lamb!’ And he added, ‘These are the true words of God.’” (Revelation 19:5-9, NIV)

If you’re unfamiliar with this passage, it’s describing the celebration that will occur after the final judgement: “God’s people are arrayed in fine linen, clean and white because Christ’s shed blood has washed away their sins. They are presented righteous and pure to their bridegroom, Christ. At the marriage supper, individual believers are guests, but collectively they are the bride.”* This links to many passages where Scripture uses a groom and his bride as a picture of God and His people in the Old Testament and Christ and the Church in the New Testament (most notably in Ephesians 5:22-32).

This brings me to an unlikely comparison– I felt the same deep joy that characterized my nephew’s wedding a few weeks later at the memorial service for my friend’s dad. Once again, people gathered to celebrate, only this time it was for the life of a man who met Jesus as a young dad and followed Him passionately for the next four and a half decades. Throughout the service, we heard stories about his love for the Lord and how it informed every aspect of his life in his home, his leisure time, and his career. A lump formed in my throat trying to sing the words to “How Great Thou Art” and “Amazing Grace.” It was overwhelming to worship the God who had used this gifted, yet humble, man to love and serve so many. 

Sitting at the service surrounded by old friends once again made me think about the great wedding feast of the Lamb. I’ve learned to savor those sweet moments at weddings and funerals when we get to pause, reflect, and recognize God’s goodness. There was a deep fulfillment in celebrating with others who faithfully followed Jesus and who were intent on seeing His kingdom advance on earth. Over time I’ve discovered that a significant bond connects those who walk the narrow path that leads to life described in Matthew 7:13-14. 

I realized both events gave a glimpse of what’s ahead for all who call Jesus Lord and Savior. One day all believers will gather at the Feast of the Lamb to worship Jesus together. I can only imagine the many joy-filled reunions between old friends and family members that will take place.  After years of following Him, we’ll see Jesus face to face and revel in His glory and grace collectively. 

As I reflect on those recent celebrations, I can’t help but think of people attending who couldn’t fully comprehend or appreciate what was taking place because they didn’t know Jesus. They were unable to access the spiritual significance or marvel at God’s faithfulness like the rest of us. They couldn’t recognize the Lord’s amazing handiwork because they had no context for it. My heart should ache for them more than it does. My prayer is that the Holy Spirit will prompt me to sow seeds of faith liberally in the lives of others in hopes that they recognize and receive God’s tremendous love. 

Kristian Stanfill’s song “Even So Come” paints an inspiring picture of waiting faithfully for our Bridegroom to return. As you listen, imagine the joyful reunion you’ll experience with Jesus one day, then go and share it with someone else so they can be a part of it too.

*Halley’s Bible Handbook, Zondervan, 2000, p. 958 

Keep Walking

The Old Testament book of Genesis mentions a man named Enoch whose greatest claims to fame were that he “walked with God” and that he didn’t experience death (Genesis 5:21 & Hebrews 11:5). While Scripture doesn’t clarify how the rest of us can circumvent physical death and be taken straight to heaven, it does have quite a bit to say about walking with God. The physical act of walking doesn’t involve tremendous skill or fitness, but it does require forward motion. Turns out this is also true of our spiritual walk with the Lord. The pages of Scripture include many words of wisdom–here are a few things I’ve learned about walking with God:

    • Talking about God’s Word is meant to be a regular part of daily life. The Bible isn’t intended to be a reference book on the shelf, but a daily guide for our actions, choices, and relationships with others. It’s meant to be shared and discussed, not kept to ourselves: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.”(Deuteronomy 6:5-7, NIV, italics added)
    • God wants to walk with us through our hardships and challenges. His constant presence guides us through our fears and difficulties. He comforts and protects us in painful seasons: “He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right path for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” (Psalm 23:2-4, NIV, italics added)
    • Constant acknowledgement of God and awareness of His presence leads to blessing. Staying closely connect to Him keeps us grounded in truth and walking in the right direction: “Blessed are those who have learned to acclaim you, who walk in the light of your presence, Lord.” (Psalm 89:15, NIV, italics added)
    • Walking with God enables us to draw strength from Him continually: “Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” (Isaiah 40:30-31, NIV, italics added)
    • Walking with God consistently helps us keep our priorities in the right order. It enables us to align with God’s agenda instead of expecting Him to align with ours, reminding us that He is sovereign and we are His humble servants. His constant companionship helps us determine where to invest our time and attention: “He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.” (Micah 6:8, NIV, italics added)
    • Walking with God keeps us out of the darkness of evil, confusion, ignorance and sin. Life is truly fulfilling when we walk in the light of God’s love and grace: “When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, ‘I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.’” (John 8:12, NIV, italics added)
    • Walking with Jesus purifies us from sin and connects us to fellow travelers on the road of faith: “But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin.” (1 John 1:7, NIV, italics added)
    • Walking with Jesus enables us to be obedient to Him and frees us to love others as He’s called us to do: “And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love.” (2 John 6, NIV, italics added)

The idea of “walking by faith” means that we are striving to see the world through the lens of our belief in God and what we learn by studying the Bible. Instead of taking things at face value, we look for the spiritual implications and opportunities for growth that exist within them. We continually ask God to show us what He wants us to learn through the situations we face.  We expect to see Him at work in our lives and are open to letting Him change us into better versions of ourselves: “So we are always of good courage. We know that while we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord, for we walk by faith, not by sight.”  (2 Corinthians 5:6-7, ESV, italics added)

Ultimately, we don’t just want to be people who talk about faith philosophically once or twice a week at church and Bible study.  We want to display faith through our actions, decisions, and lifestyle.  This happens as we grow in our understanding of God and learn to trust Him more

If any of these things are new concepts for you, don’t fret!  Learning and growing is an ongoing process, not a one-time transaction. Whether you’re taking the first step in your faith walk or continuing the next leg of a long journey, you’re headed in the right direction if Jesus is your constant companion.

“Walk by Faith” by Jeremy Camp provides a great reminder for us to walk consistently with God, no matter what.

God of Creation by Jen Wilkin (week 7), Lifeway Press 2017.

Artwork by Jen Murphy

Knit Together

Turning the page on the calendar, there is finally the slightest hint of fall in the air. Kids are back in school and the long sunny days of summer are starting to wane. It’s cool and damp in the mornings and temperatures seem to drop as soon as the sun sets in the evenings. Suitcases have been emptied and stowed away. We scroll through vacation photos with fond memories, but are ready for the rhythm of the fall to begin. Although we enjoy the unstructured months of summer, many of us are craving a more regular routine. It’s not so much the repetition that we long for, but the consistent overlap with others. As much as we love the freedom of doing what we want when we want, we all need consistent encouragement, accountability, and support. Relationships with others keep us tethered to the things we value.

Without a doubt, one of the things I look forward to most is returning to a group Bible study. Although I continued to study Scripture and pray on my own during the summer, I’m looking forward to being with others who are ready to dive into God’s Word together. I think that’s why Paul’s remarks in Colossians jumped off the page when I read them recently:

I want them to be encouraged and knit together by strong ties of love. I want them to have complete confidence that they understand God’s mysterious plan, which is Christ himself. (Colossians 2:2, NLT)

I love visualizing the community of believers as being “knit together by strong ties of love.” I picture God taking individual strands of yarn and looping them together to create a warm blanket of love. Another translation describes being knit together as being “encouraged in heart and united in love.” Who wouldn’t want that?

Although I’m not a knitter, I’ve noticed something about those who are: they’re always working on a blanket, sweater, scarf or hat and looking for someone they can bless with it. And because we were created in God’s image, I know they are mirroring what their Maker does. Turning the pages of Scripture, it’s clear that God created us for one another.  He loves taking stray threads and knitting them into the fabric of fellowship. He offers this gift to us throughout our lives, just as He’s done with people since the beginning of time.

The Greek word for fellowship is Koininia, which author and teacher Kelly Minter describes as “joint ownership, mutual sharing, community with God or one another around the shared life of Jesus in our everyday lives.” My favorite part about Koininia is that it’s not a closed system or a defined group—there is always room to add someone else. This has been true since the early days of the Christian faith:

All the believers devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, and to fellowship, and to sharing in meals (including the Lord’s Supper) and to prayer…all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved. (Acts 2:42 & 47, NLT)

So, I can’t wait to see God’s “knitting projects” for this year. I look forward to re-connecting with old friends and discovering new ones. I’m eager to see how the Lord will use His Word to speak to us, to inspire us, and to call us to action. I love that He’ll be doing this wherever people gather in His name all over the world. He creates beautiful things as He knits believers together.

Fellowship starts by building our lives on the firm foundation of God’s love. When we pursue Him, we’ll be blessed to experience authentic community with others who are doing the same. It’s worth the time and effort to invest in a group that desires to grow in faith and to be grounded in biblical truth. If you haven’t made plans already for this fall, take the time this week to find or start a group you can grow with this year. Don’t miss out on the opportunity to be encouraged in heart and united in love.

“Build My Life” by Housefires is an awesome worship song that puts words to this idea.

Better Together

Glancing at my notes from a recent sermon, I was reminded that being in community is healthy for our minds, bodies and spirits. This is God’s design for us because our consistent connections with others are catalysts for spiritual growth and conduits of emotional strength. I can attest to the truth of these ideas because I’ve experienced the power of community. But if I’m honest, I vividly recall how disillusioned and discouraged this topic once made me feel.

I still remember walking out of church a decade ago upset and angry during a similar sermon series. A hard shell of cynicism covered over the hurt I was nursing from some close relationships that were unraveling before my eyes. At the time, I remember feeling that sermons touting the joys of community were riddled with half-truths. They never seemed to acknowledge the hard parts when relationships splinter and communities fall apart.

I remember feeling embarrassed and ashamed that I had seemingly failed at one of the cornerstones of the Christian lifestyle. I felt lonely and insecure and hesitant to share my pain with anyone else. I wondered if I had some glaring flaw that made me incapable of being part of a community. Worse still, maybe everyone else could see it but me. I now know those were only lies.

Since that season of pain, God has used Scripture, wise people, and life experience to teach me some significant truths about the blessings and challenges of being in Christian community. If you can identify with any of the negative feelings I described above, I hope you’ll be encouraged by what follows. (And even if you’re feeling great about community, it wouldn’t hurt to be aware of what can happen).

Truth #1- Communities Ebb and Flow; Even Good Ones Don’t Last Forever: People and circumstances continue to change and evolve over time. When we connect with a good group of people, this doesn’t mean it will last forever. We’re setting ourselves up for disappointment if we expect our relationships to remain static in an ever-changing world. Sometimes a group just runs its course and you can sense it’s time to move on. It may be wiser and healthier to view the good times with cherished communities as seasons rather than assuming they’ll last indefinitely.

There is a time for everything,  and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal,  a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace. (Ecclesiastes 3:1-7, NIV)

Truth #2- People in Community Hurt Each Other Sometimes:  If we expect every relationship to be lovely and perfect all the time, we’re probably not engaging in authentic community. People usually don’t mean to hurt us, but sometimes they do. They fail to meet our expectations and disappoint us. They don’t listen to everything we say and forget important things we’ve shared. They don’t always know what to do when we’re struggling or in pain. But here’s the thing: if you remove yourself from community because you’ve been hurt or disappointed, the person most affected by this is you. When you experience pain in a community you value, try to evaluate if you need to address the issue with the offending person/people or if you just need to forgive them and ask the Lord to heal your pain. Communities often drift apart when people avoid dealing with areas where there is hurt or disagreement. “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” (Hebrews 10:24-25, NV)

Truth #3- Strained and Broken Relationships Can Be Mended in Time: Communities sometimes fracture when our feelings get hurt and no one notices. They also fall apart when competition, jealousy, and comparison take center stage. Avoid the impulse to nurse your hurt feelings, don’t let them control your thoughts and actions. Try not to fill in the blanks with assumptions about how others view you when you’re feeling insecure. If negative feelings have taken over, it may be time to pull back for a while and lean into the Lord for a perspective shift. Take a break from the relationship, but don’t close the door on it for good. You may be surprised to discover how God redeems it later when emotions simmer down. Practice Paul’s advice: “Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.” (Romans 12:12, NIV)

Truth #4- It’s Best to Nurture Relationships in Several Communities: Maybe you’re like me and when you find a few quality people, you want to wrap your arms around them and pull them in close forever. There is danger in narrowing your community to only a few individuals. For starters, you’re missing out on other awesome people who could bless you. Additionally, when you hit a rough patch with your targeted few, you’ll have no one else to seek for comfort and wisdom. Diversify your friendships in a handful of communities and realize that no single person or group can meet all your needs. Make a goal to leave room for new friendships to grow in every season of life. This keeps relationships from becoming stale and your expectations of one person or group from becoming too intense.

Being a part of a community has the potential to bring great joy, encouragement, and growth. And at times, it may cause some pain and disillusionment. It was no different with people throughout the pages of Scripture starting with Adam and Eve and continuing with Abraham, Moses, Jesus, Paul, and a multitude of others. In good times and bad, be encouraged that we really are better together.

Be inspired by an illustration of authentic community in Francesca Battistelli’s song “If We’re Honest.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lDcTvtuuVU8

Come to the Table

Standing in our driveway, we chatted with our neighbors who had moved in a few days before. Wanting to be welcoming, I offered to host a few families on our block for a backyard barbeque so we could introduce them to more people. I had every intention of following through, but life just got in the way and before I knew it, summer turned to fall and the school year was under way. The time for backyard gatherings had passed but the unfulfilled promise nagged at me all year.

So, when we turned the page on the calendar and welcomed in June, I started making plans.  With surprisingly little effort, the six families that live adjacent to us found a date to gather in our yard for dinner. Some had lived on the block for years, but still only knew each other vaguely. Others had never met, despite living only a few doors down. The group included a variety of ages, life situations, nationalities, backgrounds, belief systems and interests. The common connection between us was simply that we were neighbors, but it was enough.

We ate, drank, laughed, and played corn hole (a game that requires little skill and provides ample opportunities for chatting). We learned interesting things about each other and swapped stories about the history of our neighborhood. The last guests didn’t leave until after 11pm.

A few nights later, I hosted another gathering in our backyard. This time it was a group of women who knew each other through the lacrosse team our sons played on together. Their boys had been to Houseboats with our youth group and since I went on the trip, I wanted to answer questions and share the significant things that had happened there. Some of the women were friends, others were getting acquainted for the first time. Despite living in the same town and having kids of similar ages, our backgrounds, belief systems and experiences varied widely. And although we didn’t know each other well, we shared openly and authentically around the table. The food and setting were simple, but the act of gathering for uninterrupted conversation was meaningful to all of us.

Curious to see the significance of shared meals around the table, I thumbed through the New Testament to see what it had to say. Several stops in different books taught me why it’s so important. Here’s what struck me:

We’re Following Jesus’ Example:  Jesus regularly gathered with others to share meals. The book of Luke records at least five instances when He ate with people, and not all of them were friends and family. He ate with the His greatest critics, the Pharisees. (Luke 7:36-50 and Luke 14:7-24). He shared meals with sinners like tax collectors and prostitutes (Luke 5:29-32, Luke 7:36-56). He provided food for people who wanted to learn from Him–and He didn’t turn them away even when there were more than 5000 to feed (Luke 9:10-36). And He ate with His closest friends–most famously recorded at the Last Supper (Luke 22:14-23). For Jesus, meals were opportunities for meaningful conversation and powerful teaching.

The act of sitting at a table and breaking bread opens doors for thoughtful discussions. It paves the way for greater appreciation of one another’s similarities and greater understanding of one another’s differences.

We’re Following the First Disciples’ Example:  The book of Acts records the early days of the Christian church. I love this description of some of the first believers:

“They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord’s Supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity— all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved.”  (Acts 2:46-47, NLT)

Gathering around food with other believers is an opportunity to enjoy fellowship—to celebrate our mutual love of Jesus and our shared desire to move in sync with Him. When we include non-believers, it’s an opportunity to draw them toward the warmth of community and authentic relationships while displaying the love of Christ.

We’re Showing Obedience to God:  The Apostles Paul and Peter both wrote extensively about how followers of Jesus are called to live and act. Included in their lists of behaviors to embrace are these simple words: “Practice hospitality” and, “Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling.” (Romans 12:13b and 1 Peter 4:9 NIV)

Note that showing hospitality isn’t about impressing others or being a great cook. It’s about opening your home and providing a place to share love and grow in relationships. Our yard isn’t fancy or particularly impressive. We bought our patio furniture over ten years ago. When we have more guests than we can fit at that table, we roll out our weathered old wooden table and use re-painted plastic chairs around it. But what we lack in sophistication, we make up for with warm hospitality and good conversation.

We’re Building Relationships and Creating Opportunities to Share Hope:  Followers of Jesus are called to give the reason for their hope (1 Peter 3:15). Jesus continually instructed His followers to tell others about the good news of life in Him. Sharing meals with others is a simple way to begin building relationships that allow us to do this. And when opportunities arise to share our faith, we can point people to Jesus who says, “Look! I stand at the door and knock. If you hear my voice and open the door, I will come in, and we will share a meal together as friends.” (Revelation 3:20, NLT)

Eating together opens the door to meaningful conversation, mutual understanding, and just plain fun. And for some, coming to the table is the first step towards discovering the hope of salvation found only in Jesus. Take time right now and pray about who God might be leading you to invite to your table, then act on God’s leading before you lose your inspiration!

Sidewalk Prophets’ song “Come to the Table” beautifully captures the significance of inviting others to sit down with you and let Jesus do the rest.

One Mind

It was the spring of my senior year in high school and I felt like an eagle ready to take flight. I was excited about college in the fall, but also eagerly anticipating the three weeks I’d be serving at a Christian camp that summer. My dream to work there had begun four years earlier when I’d been a new camper on the brink of starting high school.

I loved everything about the camp and couldn’t wait to be old enough to apply for the “work crew” position available to graduating seniors. The positive and encouraging environment there was infectious and intoxicating. The camp staff was young and fun-loving but also had a deep faith that I admired. Of course, I also enjoyed basking in the sunshine, learning to waterski, socializing with friends, and sleeping on the houseboat roof at night. But more than that, I was drawn to something deep, authentic, and inspiring about the whole environment.

Naturally, I couldn’t wait to work there. When I was finally old enough, I jumped at the opportunity to apply. A few months later I stepped onto the front deck of a little houseboat for my first round of staff training. I was giddy with excitement. As the weekend unfolded, however, feelings of dismay began to eclipse my enthusiasm. Others on staff seemed to know and love Jesus in a way that I’d never experienced. They sang worship songs with passion and relished the idea of sharing their deep love for Jesus with campers. I felt like a fraud by comparison. My walk with God had been inconsistent in high school and pleasing Him had not been my focus. My motivation to serve at camp had been fueled by wanting extended time in the Christian environment I’d loved so much as camper. Improving my tan and getting in a little waterskiing were side bonuses that didn’t sound so bad either.

Looking back, I see now that although I’d accepted Jesus as my savior years earlier, I’d never allowed Him to be Lord of my life. I enjoyed parts of the Christian lifestyle, but I’d never pursued my personal relationship with Jesus consistently. I had several areas I’d been unwilling to surrender to Him. My motives and goals for being on staff weren’t bad, they were just immature. I had been focusing on the positive experiences I could gain from serving at camp; others on staff were fueled by a love for Jesus and the desire to impact campers for Him. Our contrasting goals give a good illustration for Paul’s words: “Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.” (Colossians 3:2, NIV). Their minds were on heavenly things, while my mind was on earthly ones.

Paul’s closing remarks in 2 Corinthians echo this sentiment: “Finally, brothers and sisters, rejoice! Strive for full restoration, encourage one another, be of one mind, live in peace. And the God of love and peace will be with you.” (2 Corinthians 13:11, NIV, emphasis added) Paul encourages all believers to have a shared vertical perspective, looking to God to define their identities, goals, and worldviews.

This teaching applies to us now as much as it did to the church at Corinth then.  As followers of Christ we’re meant to pursue Him individually, but we’re also called to “be of one mind” collectively. Unfortunately, it’s all too common for believers to gather with a variety of intentions and motives and to have no unity at all. Like my camp experience, we can be in the same place for entirely different reasons. Earlier in 2 Corinthians 13:5 Paul encourages the Corinthians to examine and test themselves. This is something we can only do on a personal level and with the help of the Holy Spirit. No one else can determine what’s truly going on in our hearts and minds.

When we’re in sync and “of one mind” with other believers, we create opportunities for God to work in powerful ways. However, when our minds are set on conflicting priorities, it creates frustration and ineffectiveness.

Maybe it’s time to take stock and determine if you’re “of one mind” with other believers in your midst. Consider a Christian group where you have an ongoing investment of time and resources—it could be your church, a Bible study, a small group, a ministry team, or a group that serves in some other way together. Ask yourself these questions and answer honestly. Invite the Holy Spirit to speak to you through what you learn about yourself.

  • Was this group set up to serve a specific goal or purpose? If so, are you striving to help it accomplish those goals through your words, actions and attitude?
  • When it comes to this group, do you usually think about what you can get from it or what you can give to it?
  • In this group are you typically more concerned about your personal comfort & personal preferences or aligning with the bigger picture purpose?
  • Are your motives for being a part of this group pure? Is there an ulterior reason you’re there?
  • When things in this group aren’t going well, are you more inclined to complain and criticize or to voice constructive concern and to pray for resolution?

As you answered these questions, did you discover anything that needs to shift in your perspective? It might be as simple as adjusting your focus and attitude. It could involve having a hard conversation or making a difficult choice. Maybe, like my camp experience, recognizing that your focus needs to change will bring much needed clarity that leads to spiritual growth.

Being “of one mind” doesn’t happen naturally for a bunch of sinners like us. It requires effort, intentionality and the supernatural work of the Holy Spirit.  Striving to be likeminded with other believers leads to unity, which was Jesus’ prayer for us from the start. On the night before His death He prayed to His Father, “I in them and you in me—so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.” (John 17:23, NIV)

Being “of one mind” allows us to accomplish God’s purposes and to show the world that He’s real. The song “Make Us One” by Jesus Culture gives even more context to the importance of striving to be unified with other believers. Make it your personal prayer as you listen today.

Building Your Spiritual Lineage

Pulling out the chair, I glanced over and smiled as we both sat down. I knew most of the people at my nephew’s graduation dinner, but the woman seated next to me was a stranger. Soon after we’d introduced ourselves, I discovered that she and her husband were the leaders of a ministry where my nephew had been involved throughout college. Despite their youthful demeanor, I learned they’d been staff members for several decades with an organization that shared the gospel with students and equipped them to pass it on to others. Having been a part of the same ministry on my college campus, it didn’t take long for us to begin sharing stories and discovering people we both knew. It was one of those “Small World” moments that make you smile, especially in Christian circles.

As Karen told me about the different universities where she’d ministered to students, one part of her story caught my attention. A mentor I’d had for just one year in college had graduated from one of the schools where Karen had served. I lobbed out my leader’s name, wondering if Karen knew her. Nearly jumping out of her seat, she couldn’t contain her enthusiasm, “Wait a minute, you’re telling me that Kim was the staff member that helped you start a Bible study in your sorority?!”

“Yes, do you know her?” I responded with a smile. (I was pretty sure I already knew the answer.)

Karen explained that she’d mentored Kim during her college years and had helped her start a Bible study in her sorority, just as Kim had done for me. Exuberant, Karen finished her story saying, “This is so cool! It’s like you’re my spiritual granddaughter! I hardly ever get the blessing of seeing a second generation of the fruit God bears through our ministry!” Being maybe 10-15 years older than me, her “grandparent” analogy made me laugh.

In the span of that one meal Karen and I went from being perfect strangers to realizing that we were part of the same spiritual lineage. She had accepted Christ in college through a friend in her sorority. She’d gone on to spend her adult life pouring into college students with the gospel that had transformed her. One of the many students she’d discipled was Kim, who later “just happened” to be my Bible study leader for one year in college. It’s a special privilege when we get to see the big picture of how God builds His house one life at a time.

Beth Moore explains, “Practically every child of God has an earthly spiritual ancestry…Taking personal ownership of our spiritual lineage—both in what we receive and what we pass down—is titanic in this Scriptural journey. Whether we are on the younger side of the generational spectrum or older, God’s sovereign way is for optimum fruitfulness and faithfulness to spring from the soil of our connectedness.” (Entrusted, p. 59)

It makes me think of Peter’s description of believers, “You also, like living stones, are being built into a spiritual house to be a holy priesthood, offering spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ.” (1 Peter 2:5, NIV) Each time we share the gospel and someone receives it, we build God’s spiritual house just a little bigger. With Christ as our foundation, we continue to expand outward and upward, with each part of the house connected to the stones that were laid earlier and supporting the ones that will be added later. The same is true of our spiritual lineage: we received the gospel from those who came before us and we have the privilege of entrusting it to others who come after us.

Standing alone, stones are uninspiring. But when they are stacked together under the watchful eye of a skilled builder and sealed in place with the Holy Spirit, they represent the hope of salvation. It makes me realize how important it is to be intentional about continuing to share with others what has been entrusted to me. If we don’t recognize the crucial role each believer plays in passing on our spiritual lineage to others, it would be like a stone house with holes in the walls.

Take Beth Moore’s words to heart and share God’s faithfulness with someone who needs to hear the gospel. And maybe one day, you’ll be blessed with the opportunity to meet a perfect stranger who turns out to be part of your spiritual lineage.

Micah Tyler’s song “Different” could be a fitting prayer for inviting God to continue His spiritual lineage through you.

Photo courtesy of pixabay.com

Beth Moore, Entrusted: A Study of 2 Timothy, Lifeway Press, 2016.

When Fellowship Fractures

As hard as it is to believe, even deep and godly friendships sometimes fracture. Paul and Barnabas are a case in point. The friendship between them may have begun when Barnabas stood up for Paul when the others were skeptical about the authenticity of his conversion in Acts 9. Later, the Holy Spirit ordained their ministry in Acts 13 and they traveled together sharing the gospel until a disagreement tore them apart. Despite their deep love for God and their history of meaningful fellowship, Acts 15 explains that these two pillars of the faith couldn’t reconcile in their opposite opinions over John Mark accompanying them on their next missionary journey. Barnabas wanted to give him a second chance after a past failure, Paul didn’t. This caused them to split up and to continue sharing the gospel in different places with new ministry partners.

Beth Moore writes about this situation, “One ministry turned into two. You and I both know it doesn’t always happen that way. It takes cooperation. We can stunt God’s redemptive work in our midst with our bitterness, unforgiveness, slander, blame, chronic regret, and unresolved guilt. Or we can go face down and beg God in our fractures to do something bigger with the broken pieces than He might have done with the whole.” (Entrusted, page 36)

Reading her words, I couldn’t help but think of how God used the broken pieces of a former relationship to make me into something better. The friendship I shared with this woman arose from our mutual desire to study God’s Word. We were the only two from our congregation that joined an in-depth Bible study at a neighboring church. After class, we’d stand in the parking lot talking enthusiastically about what we’d learned long after the rest of the cars had pulled away. My son, a toddler at the time, would fuss and squirm in his car seat once his Cheerios ran out or the sippy cup was empty. Finally, I’d have to interrupt her animated sharing with an apology and a promise to continue the conversation later. I could usually feel her disappointment as I pulled away.

A year later, our enthusiasm to study God’s Word with others led us to start a new Bible study for our own church with the help of a seasoned teacher. It was an exciting time of spiritual growth and meaningful fellowship centered on God’s Word. So much so, that I ignored the subtle warning signs that would lead to future problems between us.

Early in our friendship, I’d given her a card expressing my gratitude to God for her. I wrote about how thankful I was that the Lord was using us in each other’s lives and told her I believed He had much more in store for our friendship. I couldn’t wait to see how things would unfold. Although God did use her in my life, what I envisioned when I wrote that card was not at all how things turned out.

Without belaboring the details, over the course of 9 months, our friendship went into a downward spiral because of some boundaries I had to put in place. Although she said she understood, she retreated with hurt and anger. I continued to pursue her to no avail. Soon I found that the groups we’d enjoyed spending time with together were having gatherings without me. Over the months, my heart sank lower and lower as many of our mutual friends backed away from me with little or no explanation. I felt cut off from the fellowship I had once enjoyed so much. This began a dark and lonely season in my life that ultimately led me to counseling.

With the help of a wise and godly therapist, I began to see where things had gone wrong and could take ownership over the unhealthy contributions I’d made to our friendship. I could also identify the things that were solely her issues and not my responsibility. Over the course of more than a year in counseling, I started to understand how the implosion of that friendship was a flash point for some deeper issues that I needed to sort through.

Without that fractured relationship, I never would have recognized the unhealthy perspectives and patterns I’d maintained for many years. I would have stunted God’s redemptive work and prevented Him from refining me through the longstanding struggles in my life. In that difficult season, I learned how to be authentic and vulnerable, how to have safe and healthy relationships, and how to function more wisely with people. Confronting my issues equipped me for opportunities to come alongside others who were struggling in different ways. It has also allowed me to navigate through the inevitable challenges that come whenever people work, serve, study, socialize, or live together (whether they are Christians or not).

I’ve thought many times about that card I wrote to my old friend early in our relationship. God did, indeed, use her in my life. He peeled back some issues that I needed to deal with so that I could reach a healthier place. And although it’s still painful to remember that season, I am ultimately grateful that it became a catalyst for heathy change in my life.

Before my former friend moved away, I tried one last time to reach out by leaving a card on her doorstep.  Although she never responded, I’m glad I told her about how God used our struggles for good in my life. I pray that the same is true for her.

If you’re struggling with a fractured relationship, don’t muddle through it alone. Let the song “Brother” by NEEDTOBREATHE be an encouragement to you today (and if you’re a woman, substitute the word “sister” if it makes you feel better.)

Beth Moore, Entrusted: A Study of 2 Timothy, Lifeway Press 2016.