Category: Trusting God

Your Weakness Lets God’s Strength Shine Through

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I started teaching high school at the tender age of 23– only five years after graduating from high school myself.  Being a new teacher was hard.  What made matters worse was that I looked like I could’ve been one of the students.  I decided that the best way to gain respect was to hide my weaknesses and insecurities.  I thought the students and parents would look down on me if I didn’t appear to have all the answers and everything “together” all the time.  Even among the other faculty members, I felt wary about sharing struggles.  I spent a lot of time compensating for my weaknesses and trying to cover them up.  That year I found myself in the staff lounge bathroom from time to time crying my eyes out over some difficulty I was facing.  Too proud to admit the truth, I’d blame my red, watery eyes on “allergies” if anyone approached me with concern for my wellbeing.

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve learned that admitting weaknesses is not only healthy and human– it’s also biblical.   To think I can do things on my own without God is simply foolish pride.  Maybe that’s why the story of Gideon appeals to me so much.  There’s no doubt he was weak.  He didn’t have the credentials needed to engage in battle against a formidable enemy—and that is exactly why God chose him.

Another reason I like Gideon is that he needed reassurance from God several times before he acted.  Just before entering battle against the Midianites with his puny army of 300, God blessed Gideon with the chance to overhear a Midianite soldier talking with his tent mate about a dream he had.   When Gideon overheard the dream and learned the men feared him and the army of Israel, he was greatly encouraged.  The story below picks up just after this in Judges 7:15-21.

When Gideon heard the dream and its interpretation, he bowed down and worshiped. He returned to the camp of Israel and called out, “Get up! The Lord has given the Midianite camp into your hands.” Dividing the three hundred men into three companies, he placed trumpets and empty jars in the hands of all of them, with torches inside.

“Watch me,” he told them. “Follow my lead. When I get to the edge of the camp, do exactly as I do. When I and all who are with me blow our trumpets, then from all around the camp blow yours and shout, ‘For the Lord and for Gideon.’”

Gideon and the hundred men with him reached the edge of the camp at the beginning of the middle watch, just after they had changed the guard. They blew their trumpets and broke the jars that were in their hands. The three companies blew the trumpets and smashed the jars. Grasping the torches in their left hands and holding in their right hands the trumpets they were to blow, they shouted, “A sword for the Lord and for Gideon!” While each man held his position around the camp, all the Midianites ran, crying out as they fled.

When the three hundred trumpets sounded, the Lord caused the men throughout the camp to turn on each other with their swords. The army fled to Beth Shittah toward Zererah as far as the border of Abel Meholah near Tabbath.

I love imagining the sound of the shattering pottery and the shouts of the soldiers.  I can just picture the shimmering light produced by the flames of 300 torches strategically placed in a circle on the hills surrounding the Midianite camp.  The small band of soldiers had been too far apart to see one another as they waited in the dark for the signal.  Imagine their triumph at the sound of the trumpet and the lights they all held high in the darkness.

These men did not fight with the traditional weapons of battle, yet God used their uncommon weapons to achieve a stunning victory.  On paper, nothing about their plan worked from a worldly perspective- they didn’t have the manpower or the tools to achieve victory, but they had God on their side.

“The weaknesses we often despise are required for the light of Christ to be seen and for the darkness around us to be dispelled.  Without the limitations and deficiencies of our vessels, we would not serve our purpose well.  Your weakness is not a liability.  It is one of your greatest assets.  God’s presence and power are best seen when our large, impressive personalities aren’t getting in the way.  So welcome His light into your weakness, and let it shine, let it shine, let it shine!”  (Priscilla Shirer, Gideon, p. 125)

So, how does this look for those of us living in the 21st century?  First and foremost, we need to recognize our weaknesses and realize they need to be surrendered to God.

For me, the process of seeing my weaknesses took quite a while.  Throughout my teens and twenties, I struggled with insecurity. I’d grown so accustomed to it that I just assumed it was a part of who I was.  Never once had I considered asking God to use it for His glory.  I did my best to compensate for it in many ways- whether by trying to achieve more academically, to wear the “right” clothes, to associate with the “right” people or to hold positions of power and respect.  While none of these things were necessarily “bad,” none of them helped to alleviate my insecurity.  (Thus, the crying in the bathroom when I was a new teacher).  Sadly, my compensating made me more intimidating and less approachable as I tried harder and harder to be “perfect” so that I would feel more secure.

It was not until after I had kids and participated in my first Beth Moore Bible study that I ever realized insecurity was a weakness I could submit to God.  As I began to pray about it, God started to change me.  He didn’t miraculously remove it from my life, but He used it to make me more sensitive to others.  I began realizing that insecurity is a pervasive issue in our culture and that many women struggle with it.   God showed me many ways Satan uses it to keep women from connecting with one another because they feel too threatened and intimidated.  Insecurity prevents many of us from living into the people God is calling us to be.   It causes us to put up unhealthy facades that prevent authentic connection.  It renders our gifts useless and often leaves us feeling like outsiders with nothing to offer.  Few Bible teachers address this issue, so it remains a silent struggle for many.

I still remember the first time I admitted that I battled with insecurity publically.  I’d been asked to sit on a panel of women at our weekly Focused Living Bible Study.  Each panelist was asked to share about an area in her life where she needed God’s intervention on a regular basis.  I had a “safe” answer prepared in my head, but when the microphone was handed to me, I horrified myself by blurting out “I struggle with insecurity.”  My face was red and my hands were shaking as I passed the microphone on to the next panelist.  Inside, I was kicking myself for being so vulnerable.

To my surprise, when the panel ended several women made a beeline for me and thanked me for sharing aloud what they‘d been struggling with for years.  Each woman thought she was the only one.   When I let my clay vessel crack open and I exposed my weakness, the light of God’s love used my honesty to encourage others.  The weakness I’d been hiding and trying to compensate for in a variety of ways became the very thing God used to make me more authentic, approachable and encouraging to others with similar struggles.

Whether or not we like to admit it, we’re all just simple clay vessels like those earthen pots the soldiers carried to battle.  Your weaknesses may be different from mine, but you have something God can use for His glory, if only you’ll surrender it to Him.  With the Holy Spirit living within us, God can use our weaknesses to shine His light to a dark world in desperate need of a Savior.

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For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness, ”made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ.  But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.  2 Corinthians 4:6-7

Click on the link below to hear Matthew West’s song “Strong Enough,” to be reminded that God’s strength trumps your weakness.

Click on the link below to hear Josh Wilson’s “Pushing Back the Dark.”  You’ll be inspired to give your weaknesses to God and to watch how He uses them to shine His light to the world through you!

It Never Hurts to Ask

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I’m generally a rule-follower by nature.  I don’t like to ruffle feathers or make requests that inconvenience people.  I don’t like to draw attention to myself.  I’m not particularly dramatic.  In the last few years, however, I’ve started getting a bit more courageous about taking risks and making requests.   A new phrase has been finding its way into my vocabulary:  “It never hurts to ask.”  My husband chuckled at my newfound courage a few months ago as I loaded two giant resin pots into the back of our car.  We’d owned them less than a year and they were already starting to fall apart due to sun damage.  I figured it was worth asking for our money back.  “It never hurts to ask,” I told my husband.  If they said “no,” we weren’t any worse off than we were before.  I lugged the pots into the store and politely explained the problem to the woman at the return counter.  She took one look at the cracking and sun-bleached pots and gave me a store credit equal to their value. That night, I proudly showed my husband the gift card I’d gotten.  “See?   This will pay for two new ones.  I told you, it never hurts to ask!”

Apparently, Gideon had a similar thought when he boldly asked God to show him a tangible sign that He was calling him into battle against the Midianites.  Here is the story from Judges 6:36-40.

Gideon said to God, “If you will save Israel by my hand as you have promised— look, I will place a wool fleece on the threshing floor. If there is dew only on the fleece and all the ground is dry, then I will know that you will save Israel by my hand, as you said.”  And that is what happened. Gideon rose early the next day; he squeezed the fleece and wrung out the dew—a bowlful of water.

Then Gideon said to God, “Do not be angry with me. Let me make just one more request. Allow me one more test with the fleece, but this time make the fleece dry and let the ground be covered with dew.” That night God did so. Only the fleece was dry; all the ground was covered with dew.

Priscilla Shirer’s contention in Gideon:  Your Weakness, God’s Strength is that once Gideon finds the fleece and the ground exactly as he asked, he begins to doubt.    Gideon wonders if he’s mistaken because the ground would naturally dry faster than the absorbent fleece.  So, he risks asking God for a second sign of confirmation.  This time, he requests that God make the ground wet and the fleece dry.  In His infinite patience, God grants Gideon’s second request.

Priscilla points out that Gideon had been heavily influenced by the predominant “religion” of Baalism.  “The universe, a Baalist would subscribe, was self-sustaining, with no eternal Being actively involved in supporting and maintaining it.  While they believed it possible to stimulate or manipulate nature/Baal to respond in a certain way, they firmly believed that the world and its happenings were independent of God’s involvement.  This made the personal, intimate relationship that Yahweh offered to Gideon contrary to his Baal-instructed mind.  He had never felt a need to pray for certain things, because the processes that nature put in place were set and could not be altered”  (Gideon, p. 111).

Priscilla then turns the tables and makes this personal:  “consider how many things we don’t take to God in prayer because we’ve grown accustomed to the usual processes we experience daily… Even God’s people have been duped into believing that either He will not really do anything on our behalf or that He doesn’t need to because certain things just happen anyway”  (Gideon, p. 112).

The book of James echoes this sentiment:  “You do not have, because you do not ask God.  When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives… Come near to God and he will come near to you”  (James 4:2b, 3a, 8a).

Last week I heard a story from a friend. It shows the contrast between asking God to intervene and assuming natural processes will just run their course.  A few years ago, my friend’s uncle found himself in the Emergency Room with crushing chest pain.  He was told that he needed to have emergency open-heart surgery to repair a dissected aorta.  The prognosis was grim.  Doctors predicted he had mere hours to live if he didn’t have the surgery and preparations were quickly made to begin.  My friend and her family members gathered in the waiting room and began praying.  Her stepfather, who was a surgeon, was granted permission to observe the surgery.  As he stood in the operating room and watched the surgeons work, the situation looked dire.   He decided to go out and give family members the sad update.  As he rounded the corner to the waiting room, he found the family sitting in a circle deep in prayer.  Not a man of the same faith, he made a hasty retreat, deciding he preferred the grim scene in the operating room to the prayer circle in the waiting room.  As he re-entered the surgery, he was shocked to discover the doctors completing a full repair on the aorta.  Miraculously, they’d been able to salvage enough tissue to suture it back together.  The doctors were incredulous and my friend’s stepfather could hardly believe what he was seeing.  In fact, the heart surgeon calls her uncle his “miracle patient” to this day.  My friend’s stepfather had just accepted that there was little hope for the uncle.  Seeing his family members praying in the waiting room had seemed like a vain and foolish attempt to ward off the inevitable.  How wrong he was.

My friend’s uncle has gone on to live for thirteen more years.  He’s had a rich and full life and has been blessed to watch his youngest daughter marry and to be a part of the lives of his three grandchildren.  And all because his family members refused to give up hope and trusted God to intervene.

Are there things in life you’ve just accepted without even considering praying about them?   Are you plodding through life not even thinking of the ways God could intervene in your circumstances if you asked Him? Maybe it’s a spouse or family member whose heart seems totally hardened toward God.  Maybe it’s a child you lock horns with daily.  Maybe it’s your health.  Maybe it’s a broken relationship that won’t seem to heal.  Maybe it’s a hidden addiction.  Maybe it’s the ongoing struggle that you’re tired of fighting against depression, anxiety, loneliness or insecurity.  Maybe it’s financial distress.  Or maybe, you’re tired of just surviving and you long to be thriving in a fuller, richer, more passionate life.

Whatever it is, there is nothing that we cannot bring to God in prayer.  He delights in invitations for Him to move and work in our lives.  We can’t necessarily tell God how to work something out, but we can grow through the act of praying and drawing near to Him.  Sometimes prayer changes our circumstances, sometimes it changes our perspectives.  Sometimes it changes both.  One thing is for sure- it never hurts to ask.

Do you have a story of God’s intervention in a situation that others assumed was “just the way it is?”  Take time to comment so that others can be encouraged by it and God can receive the praise.


God Margin: When God’s 300 is Greater Than the Enemy’s 135,000

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2 The Lord said to Gideon, “You have too many men. I cannot deliver Midian into their hands, or Israel would boast against me, ‘My own strength has saved me.’ 3 Now announce to the army, ‘Anyone who trembles with fear may turn back and leave Mount Gilead.’” So twenty-two thousand men left, while ten thousand remained.

4 But the Lord said to Gideon, “There are still too many men. Take them down to the water, and I will thin them out for you there. If I say, ‘This one shall go with you,’ he shall go; but if I say, ‘This one shall not go with you,’ he shall not go.”

5 So Gideon took the men down to the water. There the Lord told him, “Separate those who lap the water with their tongues as a dog laps from those who kneel down to drink.” 6 Three hundred of them drank from cupped hands, lapping like dogs. All the rest got down on their knees to drink.

7 The Lord said to Gideon, “With the three hundred men that lapped I will save you and give the Midianites into your hands. Let all the others go home.” 8 So Gideon sent the rest of the Israelites home but kept the three hundred, who took over the provisions and trumpets of the others.

Now the camp of Midian lay below him in the valley. 12 The Midianites, the Amalekites and all the other eastern peoples had settled in the valley, thick as locusts. Their camels could no more be counted than the sand on the seashore.  –Judges 7:2-8, 12

I love the story of Gideon because he had no choice but to trust God and to watch how His plan would unfold to rescue the children of Israel from the Midianites.  “If anything was going to be the downfall of these people, it wouldn’t be Midian; it would be Israel’s pride.  So God purposefully, lovingly stripped down Gideon’s army to the bare bones, leaving them no choice but to rely on Yahweh for victory”  (Gideon by Priscilla Shirer, p. 76).

In case you need a refresher, here it is:  Gideon was called by God to lead the Israelites in defeating the Midianites who had been oppressing them.  God wanted to be sure that there was no question among the Israelites about who was responsible for their victory, so He whittled the Israelite army down from 32,000 men to 300. “Thus, God minimized pride’s chances of taking credit for a victory”  (Gideon, p. 75).

I’ve been struggling to write this blog—not because I can’t identify with this story, but because too many different examples in my own life come to mind.  In the past year, I’ve seen the truth of Gideon’s story over and over again.  Priscilla Shirer says “we need not see our weaknesses as repulsive, but as helpful in developing our continued dependence on God”  (p. 76).  When we lay our weaknesses at God’s feet and admit we can’t handle things on our own, He steps in to do some of His best work.

One of the places I feel my weakness most is when I watch someone I love struggling.  Over the course of the last several years, I stood by while my husband become progressively more discouraged at work.  It was like a heavy weight that burdened him all the time, consuming his thoughts and robbing his joy.  Finally, we reached a point last winter when he hit an all time low. He felt stuck—unable to make a change for a variety of valid reasons, yet struggling with the thought of continuing where he was.  One night as we sat on the couch having yet another conversation about it I said, “We need to be praying about this more consistently.  I’m going to ask God to change either your circumstances or your perspective.”  My husband answered, “I don’t really see how either one is going to change, but I guess it can’t hurt to try.”  We prayed for months and nothing seemed to be happening

In late spring, his discouragement plummeted even lower.  The subject of his job dominated our conversations.  We talked for hours on end and reached the same conclusion every time- prayer was our best and only real option.  At one point, I remember saying:  “I can’t wait to see how God shows up.  The more impossible the situation seems to us, the more obvious it is that He’s at work.”

A few weeks later, my husband got an unexpected phone call from a company who was looking to fill a new position.  It was a unique opportunity at a place he’d ruled out for a variety of reasons.  He entered into dialogue with the company cautiously, but with a glimmer of hope.  A series of meetings and interviews over the summer caused a roller coaster of emotions in our household.   There were several major obstacles that seemed insurmountable.  We continued to pray and ask God whether this opportunity was what He had planned for my husband.  With each step of the process, God stripped away anything that would cause us to believe we were in control.  We tried hard to keep the right perspective.  We wanted to put our hope in God and not in this particular job opportunity.

In late summer my husband was officially offered the job.  We’d been praying for peace and clarity and when he received the offer, we knew what he had to do.  He turned it down.  Although he wanted to work there, neither of us felt peace with the terms of employment.  Although it was disappointing, we knew it would be obvious when God was giving us the green light.  We truly believed He had something else in store, even if it meant waiting longer.

To our amazement, the company came back the next day and responded to every one of my husband’s specific concerns.  Each issue we’d prayed for throughout the summer was addressed clearly and decisively.  All of the reservations he’d had were resolved and we both felt peace.  There was no explanation other than God’s hand at work.

Priscilla Shirer calls it “God Margin.”  She says “it’s the space that exists between your skills and resources and what God can accomplish (Gideon Session 3 video). IMG_6035

My husband started his new job last week.  He has a spring in his step and a sparkle in his eye that’s been missing for quite a while.  When people ask about the new job, he says,  “It’s been overwhelmingly positive.  I’m truly humbled by the way God has worked.”  His joy doesn’t come from his new company, but from the blessing of trusting God and watching Him work in ways that were beyond anything we could have imagined.   God did change my husband’s circumstances, but He also changed his perspective and reminded him that our true hope never faltered.

There is nothing unique about our story—we all have opportunities for “God Margin” in our lives regularly.   When we acknowledge our weaknesses and offer them up to God, we get to see how He’ll use them for His glory.

I encourage you to commit your seemingly “hopeless” situation to God and wait for Him to reveal Himself in the midst of it.  Keep in mind, however– God rarely does things according to our plans.   Give Him lots of room to work in His way and His time frame instead of telling Him how you want it resolved.

If you already have a good “God Margin” story to share, please post a comment below.

For more encouragement, click on the link below to hear Matt Maher’s song “Lord, I Need You.”  It’s a great reminder to find your strength in God throughout every day.

God Cares About the Small Stuff Too

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Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.  See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.  -Psalm 139:23-24

We recently turned the page on our wall calendar and find ourselves in August.  My boys are still in denial about school starting at the end of this month despite the fact that “Back to School” ads are flooding our mailbox daily. I’ve never been a big fan of the ramp up to school and my mind churns at night with all of the things I have to do:  arranging sports carpools, filling in dates on my calendar, scheduling appointments, buying needed supplies, sifting through closets and drawers… the list is endless.  I can spend hours thinking through logistics and trying to make arrangements.

Recently I was having a conversation with another mom who was feeling a bit overwhelmed about the start of school.  A few carefully arranged plans she’d made for the school year had fallen apart unexpectedly and she was frantically trying to re-group.  I spent some time listening to her lament and trying to encourage her.  When I went home that night, I sent her a short e-mail.

“I know logistics and planning can be overwhelming at times.  One thing I’ve learned is that if I’m thinking about it, God wants to hear about it.  My default mode is to worry instead of trusting God with my problem.  I’m try to trust God more with all of my logistical details and watch to see how He works them out.”

She responded with a thought I’ve heard echoed many times in the past.  “I guess I just feel like it’s selfish to ask God about the small stuff.  I should be able to work it out on my own instead of wasting His time.”

Let me be perfectly clear on this.  The notion that God has limited time is absurd.  He exists outside the boundaries of time and always has enough for all of us all the time.  He’s never overwhelmed.  He’s never in a hurry.  Need some Biblical proof?  Check out this passage from 2 Peter 3:8-

“But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day.”

God delights in us when we admit that we need Him- even for the small stuff.  The myth of self-sufficiency and personal control keeps us from trusting God in so many places in our lives.  God cares about every detail of our lives—even carpools, school schedules and frustrations at work.

“Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.”   Matthew 10:29-31

IMG_5665Can you count how many strands of hair there are on these two heads?  (Yeah, me neither– and I look at them every day!!)IMG_5659I’m learning that when I pray about my logistical frustrations, I’m more at peace with the way things unfold.  Instead of telling God how He should work in a situation, I rely on Him to resolve it according to His will and thank Him that He is trustworthy.  That way, no matter how the situation ends up, I know that it has happened for a reason and I look for the ways God wants to use it in my life.  It’s easier to recognize His hand in a situation when I’ve laid it at His feet in advance.

Praying about my frustrations doesn’t always mean that God answers the way I want or expect.  However, I’m much more apt to accept less-than-favorable outcomes and to look for the ways God is using them in my life.   When my kids don’t get the teachers or coaches I was hoping for I remind myself that God has a reason and I have to trust Him for it.   When I don’t end up with a close friend in my small group at Bible Study, I’ve learned to trust that God has a plan instead of getting indignant.  When the carpool doesn’t work out, I try to enjoy the one-on-one time with one of my sons on the way to practice.  And when my plate is simply too full, I’m learning to see the things God wants me to clear off of it.

Being anxious and trying to orchestrate every detail and logistic just wastes energy and causes angst.   I think Paul must’ve known this when he penned these verses:

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-8

The passage admonishes us not to be anxious about anything.  It also says that in every situation we can thank God for how He’s going to work it out.  Once we lay it before Him, we’re freed up to experience His peace and to wait for Him to work.  When we feel anxiety creeping in, we need to stop and pray: “Guard my heart and mind, God.”

In case you’re still struggling with the idea that God doesn’t want to be bothered with the details, take a minute to think about your own children (if you have them) or your parents.  Loving parents care about the smallest details in their children’s lives.    God cares about details in your life the same way.

The Bible often refers to God as our “Abba,” which is simply the Hebrew way to say “Daddy.”   We are his children, whom He loves and cherishes.  No logistical detail is too small to escape His attention.

“For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.”  The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children.”  Romans 8:14-16

It seems like I have a new challenge to trust God with every day.  I have a hard time applying what I’ve written about, but God keeps reminding me to come back after I’ve become too overwhelmed trying to do things on my own.

If you can relate to the August Angst I’m feeling, chime in and share how God is at work in your life through it.