We’re in that transitional season between spring and summer. Many college kids, including my son, have wrapped up finals and are returning home for a few months. I love bumping into students I know around town and hearing about their experiences during the first year away. Usually, one of the questions I ask them is, “How was your roommate?” The answer to that question gives a brief sketch of the triumphs and troubles they experienced out on their own.
Most of us can vividly remember a roommate or two from an earlier season in life. If my memory serves me correctly, I had ten different ones between the time I graduated from high school and got married. Some became amazing friends with whom I still have relationships. Others provided me with opportunities to practice patience and to give grace. (That’s putting a positive spin on some of the less than ideal roommates I had–I’m sure a few of them could tell stories about me too.) Having a few challenging roommate experiences is a rite of passage as we move towards adulthood, isn’t it?
For most of us, the constantly changing living situations of early adulthood eventually fade as we establish more permanent residences. But even if we’ve lived with the same person for many years, there are still “roommates” that rotate in and out of our lives. Only now, most of them reside in our minds and hearts and influence our thought patterns. Many of them create significant internal conflict as they battle for space in our souls. Two prominent ones are faith and fear.
Here’s how Bible teacher Beth Moore describes these competing metaphorical roommates: “Biblically speaking, fear and faith fight for the same space. Each is territorial….think in terms of your soul being a house and Fear and Faith are knocking at your door. Each desires to occupy expansive square footage in the house of your soul…Any square foot or inch where Fear abides in your life is the precise ground Faith exists to occupy. Fear and faith cannot be roommates. They will not coexist. The one assigned authority automatically elbows the other off the space.” (Beth Moore The Quest pages 33-34)
For many of us, fearful thinking is our natural default mode. It requires intentional effort to trust God and cling to our faith in Him when life throws us curve balls. “If you can find your fear, you can always know where to send your faith. No, faith is not as easy to come by as fear, but it is colossally easier to live with. What faith costs you in tenacity, fear up-charges you in misery.” (Beth Moore, The Quest, p. 34)
I recognized the truth of Beth’s words recently when my husband and I were on a walk discussing a difficult situation in our family. The conversation turned to speculating about how the future would unfold with the challenges we were facing. The scenarios we began painting were not pretty and I soon found myself gripped with fear. At that moment, the Holy Spirit pulled me back into the present and reminded me of His faithfulness. My husband and I don’t know what will transpire, but we can trust that God will be with us no matter how it unfolds. Fear had to be ushered out so that faith could take center stage again.
More than anyone else, Jesus understands the battle between faith and fear. Mark 4:35-41 tells the story of Jesus and His disciples crossing the Sea of Galilee when a furious squall threatens to swamp their boat. After the frightened disciples awaken Him from a nap and He calms the storm, Jesus says, “Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?” (Mark 4:40, NIV) That question makes me squirm uncomfortably when I think of the different “storms” I’m facing that cause fear to wash over me.
Maybe Jesus’ question convicts you too. The point isn’t to make us feel bad, but to show us that fear and faith are opposites that can’t share mental space in our lives. We need to strive to let faith occupy more real estate in our minds than fear. That’s why I cling to Jesus’ reassuring words, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” (John 14:27, NIV)
The lyrics to “Cast My Cares” by Finding Favour have been playing regularly in my mind over the past few weeks. As you listen, let the words reassure you and remind you to focus on God’s faithfulness instead of your fears.
Beth Moore, The Quest: An Excursion Toward intimacy with God, Lifeway Press, 2017.