Category: Doubt

Sunshine and Shadows

In one day, Job lost his ten children, numerous servants, and all the livestock he owned, obliterating his family and livelihood. Consumed by grief, he tore his robe, shaved his head, and fell to the ground to worship God saying, “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I will depart. The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised.” (Job 1:21, NIV)

Scripture tells us, “In all this, Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing.” (Job 1:22, NIV)

While Job’s grief was still fresh “Satan went out from the presence of the Lord and afflicted Job with painful sores from the soles of his feet to the crown of his head. Then Job took a piece of broken pottery and scraped himself with it as he sat among the ashes. His wife said to him, ‘Are you still maintaining your integrity? Curse God and die!’ He replied, ‘You are talking like a foolish woman. Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?’ In all this, Job did not sin in what he said.” (Job 2:7-10, NIV)

What strikes me most isn’t the tragedy of Job’s losses, but his response to them. In his grief, he worshiped the Lord and accepted the harsh turn of events. Does this surprise you like it does me? Praising God through difficult times feels foreign to us. Maybe it’s because our culture seems obsessed with comfort and ease and labels anything that’s hard or painful as bad or wrong. 

Even among Christians, there is a sense that God is good… as long as He does things the way we want. We thank Him when He answers prayers according to our desires and question Him when He implements a different plan. We’ve developed a quiet sense of entitlement, believing we have a right to certain things. We think we deserve a smooth path devoid of obstacles and are injured and indignant when God allows hardship instead. We take the good things in our lives for granted instead of seeing them as blessings. And we question whether God really is good or loving when something hard happens that disrupts what we consider “normal.” We rarely embrace that life is a balance of sunshine and shadows. Instead, we become doubtful, cynical, or self-pitying when dark clouds obscure our bright skies.

Sometimes we forget that the Lord deserves praise regardless of our circumstances. We focus on what He does or doesn’t do instead of who He is. I remember being struck by this realization many years ago when I witnessed parallel tragedies with opposite outcomes. In the span of two years, two little girls I loved faced dire situations: one was diagnosed with a brain tumor and the other almost drowned. Both spent time in the hospital ICU with grim diagnoses. One ended up losing her life; the other made a full recovery. Both came from families of faith who had prayed for miracles and trusted God to do what was best.

I don’t know why the Lord chose to heal one while allowing the other to die. It remains a mystery why one family got to resume their “normal” life, while the other was altered forever. Despite the opposite outcomes, both families accepted the pain God had allowed and grew deeper in their relationships with Him. Their trust in the Lord was inspiring and had a ripple effect on everyone who knew them, and many who didn’t.

These incidents gave me a fuller understanding of the Psalmist who says: “My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him.  He alone is my rock and my salvation, he is my fortress, I will never be shaken” (Psalm 62:1-2, NIV ‘84) As followers of Jesus, we understand that salvation and security lie outside the realm of circumstances. Whether earthly events turn out well or not, our true hope has an eternal perspective because death cannot separate us from God. 

There is a temptation to spend so much time questioning the Lord in hard times that we miss the opportunity to trust Him and let Him comfort us.  We wrestle with doubt and ask, “Why is God letting this happen?” Meanwhile, we overlook the places where He is showing up; where He is giving us tangible answers. Being consumed by self-pity also causes us to miss the ways He wants to teach and refine us through painful times. Additionally, it means we bypass chances to show others His goodness. In God’s economy, pain shouldn’t be wasted like this.

We can’t forget that no matter what hardships we encounter in this life, God wins in the end.  The Psalmist states it so clearly: “Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you. I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift up my hands… On my bed I remember you; I think of you through the watches of the night.  Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.  My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me.” (Psalm 63:3-4,6-8, NIV ‘84) Ultimate hope doesn’t come from expecting God to turn circumstances in our favor; it comes from knowing His love is better than even life itself. Trusting His hand to hold us up and remembering that He walks with us through the darkness gives us the comfort we need. Because of His presence, we can find joy in the darkness– not a happy, smiling, giddy kind of joy, but a deep, peaceful assurance that He is in control and always has been.

Beloved author and preacher Oswald Chambers wrote: “We imagine we would be all right if a big crisis arose; but the big crisis will only reveal the stuff we are made of, it will not put anything into us… Crises always reveal character.” When we put our trust in God and walk with Him daily, when we seek His face, study His word, and obey Him in humble reliance, we will see Him molding and shaping our characters little by little.  At the same time, He will be revealing His character and His goodness to us. And when trouble comes, we’ll continue to trust Him and give Him the praise He deserves.

“Yes I Will” by Vertical Worship is a song of defiant praise during hardship. Let it fill you with renewed hope today.

Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest, Discovery House Publishers, 1935, 1963, Sept. 10 entry.  

Praying Honestly

Few people have heard the audible voice of God. There are a several instances recorded in Scripture when individuals dialogued with Him, but there’s one person who had multiple conversations with the Lord throughout his life–Moses. Some of the things we can learn about prayer from this hero of the faith may surprise you.

Let’s start with some background context. You might remember that Moses was born as a Hebrew slave in Egypt. His people, the Israelites, had emigrated to Egypt from Canaan about 400 years earlier during a severe famine. When they first arrived in Egypt, the Israelites were a large extended family of about seventy people consisting of twelve brothers, their wives and their children. Their father was Jacob, who had been re-named “Israel” by God. His family members and their descendants became known as Israelites. The Egyptians also called them Hebrews. Jacob and his eleven adult sons came with their families to Egypt at the invitation of Joseph, the twelfth son who had risen to a position of honor and power in Egypt. (This is the same Joseph that received the coat of many colors from his father and who was sold into slavery by his brothers as a teenager. His story is in Genesis 37, 39, 40-50.)

After Joseph’s death, life for the Israelites began to deteriorate as new Pharaohs came to power. The Israelites’ population steadily increased. This caused subsequent Pharaohs to fear the Hebrews would become so numerous they could overpower Egypt by joining its enemies if war broke out. To eliminate this threat, the Egyptians eventually enslaved the Hebrews and worked them ruthlessly.

In Exodus 1 & 2 we learn that Pharaoh’s solution for controlling the Hebrew population was to order that all Israelite baby boys be slaughtered at birth. However, when Moses was born, his mother concealed him for the first three months of his life.  Scripture explains, “But when she could hide him no longer, she got a papyrus basket for him and coated it with tar and pitch. Then she placed the child in it and put it among the reeds along the bank of the Nile. His sister stood at a distance to see what would happen to him.

Then Pharaoh’s daughter went down to the Nile to bathe, and her attendants were walking along the riverbank. She saw the basket among the reeds and sent her female slave to get it. She opened it and saw the baby. He was crying, and she felt sorry for him. ‘This is one of the Hebrew babies,’ she said. Then his sister asked Pharaoh’s daughter, ‘Shall I go and get one of the Hebrew women to nurse the baby for you?’

‘Yes, go,’ she answered. So the girl went and got the baby’s mother. Pharaoh’s daughter said to her, ‘Take this baby and nurse him for me, and I will pay you.’ So the woman took the baby and nursed him.  When the child grew older, she took him to Pharaoh’s daughter and he became her son. She named him Moses, saying, ‘I drew him out of the water.’” (Exodus 2:3-10, NIV)

Moses grew up as a prince in the household of Pharaoh, However, at the age of 40 his life pivoted dramatically when he decided to kill an Egyptian who he’d witnessed beating Hebrew slaves. Fearing retribution from Pharaoh, Moses fled to the neighboring land of Midian where he later married the daughter of a priest and lived as a shepherd.

Moses’ first personal encounter with God occurred when he was 80 years old. The swagger he had as a prince of Egypt had been stripped from him after four decades of being humbled in the desert.  His first conversation with God caught him by surprise while he was tending his flocks: “There the angel of the Lord appeared to him in flames of fire from within a bush. Moses saw that though the bush was on fire it did not burn up. So Moses thought, ‘I will go over and see this strange sight—why the bush does not burn up.’ When the Lord saw that he had gone over to look, God called to him from within the bush, ‘Moses! Moses!’

And Moses said, ‘Here I am.’

‘Do not come any closer,’ God said. ‘Take off your sandals, for the place where you are standing is holy ground.’ Then he said, ‘I am the God of your father, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac and the God of Jacob.’ At this, Moses hid his face, because he was afraid to look at God.” (Exodus 3:2-6, NIV)

The Lord went on to explain that He had seen the misery of His people and was appointing Moses to go and lead his people out of slavery. Shocked, Moses’ first words to God were: “Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the Israelites out of Egypt?” (Exodus 3:11, NIV)

The Lord replied, “I will be with you. And this will be the sign to you that it is I who have sent you: When you have brought the people out of Egypt, you will worship God on this mountain.” (Exodus 3:12, NIV)

What stands out to me in this conversation is Moses’ surprising combination of reverence and honesty. He knelt humbly before the Lord and hid his face, but then boldly proclaimed his doubts about being able to fulfill the task he’d been given. Instead of just saying, “Yes, Lord” and then walking away with angst wondering how he’d follow through, he openly expressed his fears. And the Lord reassured Moses, promising to be with him and to give him a sign of His faithfulness. 

Later in the same conversation, Moses again showed bold honesty with the Lord saying, “’Pardon your servant, Lord. I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.’

The Lord said to him, ‘Who gave human beings their mouths? Who makes them deaf or mute? Who gives them sight or makes them blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say.’

But Moses said, ‘Pardon your servant, Lord. Please send someone else.’

Then the Lord’s anger burned against Moses and he said, ‘What about your brother, Aaron the Levite? I know he can speak well. He is already on his way to meet you, and he will be glad to see you. You shall speak to him and put words in his mouth; I will help both of you speak and will teach you what to do. He will speak to the people for you, and it will be as if he were your mouth and as if you were God to him.’” (Exodus 4:10-16, NIV)

Moses’ lack of eloquence and fear of public speaking made him want to opt out of the Lord’s call on his life. Once again, God reassured him and even made a provision for his insecurity by offering to let his brother communicate for him. (Let’s not miss the irony that we’re learning about prayer from a hero of the faith who didn’t think he was skilled at speaking.)

The conversation Moses had with God inspires me to speak honestly in my prayers and to admit my inadequacies. It gives me the freedom to tell Him about my lack of confidence and to express my doubt that He could work through me. God’s reassurance and provision for Moses encourages me that we don’t need to be intimidated when approaching Him. We can be reverent but honest. When we read something in Scripture that seems too difficult or daunting to obey, we can be truthful, admit our hesitation, and ask Him to help us wrestle through it.

Is it time to take off your polite veneer in prayer and to be honest before God about your struggles, weaknesses, and inadequacies? If God reassured Moses and provided for him, there’s a good chance He’ll do the same for you.

Need a more modern example of an honest conversation with God? Then enjoy Jason Gray’s song “I’m Gonna Let It Go.”

God is With Us in Our Doubts

Are you so familiar with the Christmas story that you skip through the details without really thinking about them? Since we know how it unfolds, we don’t let the drama of the events really sink in. Take Joseph, for example. Here’s what Scripture tells us about him:

“This is how the birth of Jesus the Messiah came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit. Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.”

Before reading what comes next, we need to pause. At this point in the story, it’s clear Mary had already told Joseph she was pregnant. Although she’d probably assured him her pregnancy was an act of God, it seems Joseph had his doubts. Being an honorable man, he decided to end their betrothal without drawing attention to Mary’s status as an unwed mother (which would have been incredibly shameful and punishable by death if he’d chosen to accuse her formally). We don’t always stop to consider the doubts and questions he must have wrestled with before making the painful decision to leave her.

While none of us can identify with Joseph’s unique situation, we can all relate to the idea of struggling with doubt.  Yet so often, we grapple with it silently because we worry what others would think of us if we did share. This is especially true when it comes to doubts about God or a life of faith.

There is nothing wrong with struggling with doubt. However, problems arise when we let it linger indefinitely–when we stop wrestling and allow it to take up permanent residence in our minds. This happens when we don’t press on to pursue answers. If we stop searching for clarity and peace, we acquiesce to being in a state of constant uncertainty.

Sometimes, we hide behind our doubts because it’s easier to stand on the outside and remain critical of things we don’t understand about faith. We feel smart being cynical and shy away from digging deeper and finding  answers to our difficult questions. Sometimes we even develop a sense of identity in being labeled as a skeptic.

I love the example set by one of my favorite doubters in the Bible. His story appears in Mark 9 when he asks Jesus to heal his son. He says, “If you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.”  Jesus responds: “If you can?  Everything is possible for him who believes.”  The man replies honestly: “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” (Mark 9:22, NIV) Who can’t relate to that? We want to believe, yet doubt lurks in the background. It’s so much better to admit it and  to be honest before the Lord than to hide it or ignore it.

Contrary to what we may feel, doubt doesn’t need to be a hindrance to knowing God. In fact, when we pursue Him for answers, He delights in revealing Himself to us. The Bible assures us, “Come near to God and he will come near to you.” (James 4:8a, NIV)

If you’re in a season of doubting, press into God instead of turning away from Him. Seek the wisdom of someone who is further ahead of you on the journey. Let your hunger for answers lead you on a quest for truth. Some of the greatest thinkers in the Christian faith started out as skeptics and have written impactful books inspired by their journeys for answers. (C.S. Lewis, Lee Strobel and Nabeel Qureshi are a few who come to mind).

If you know someone who is doubting, don’t be unsettled by their questions. Instead, offer yourself as a safe person to help them process their thoughts. It’s unlikely you’ll have all the answers, but you can commit to looking for them together. What’s most important is that you listen and share what you’ve learned on your faith journey. Be willing to engage in fearless conversations with them and don’t be upset or shocked when they share things that are contrary to what you believe. Giving a person time and space to explore doubts is one of the best ways to show God’s love. And don’t forget, God is with you as you walk with them. He will supply the wisdom and resources you need to help them. All you have to do is ask.

Let’s circle back to Joseph’s story for a moment. Before he let his doubts about Mary’s pregnancy determine his course, the Lord provided the reassurance he needed:

“But after [Joseph] had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, ‘Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.’ All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: ‘The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel’ (which means ‘God with us’).” (Matthew 1:18-23, NIV)

Joseph awoke from his dream with a sense of peace and purpose. He put his doubts aside, followed the angel’s directive, and took Mary as his wife. He rested in the knowledge that God was with him.

The angel’s declaration that the child growing in Mary’s womb was “God with us” was good news not just for Joseph, but for all of us. The truth of those words is so simple and yet so profound. God came to earth in the form of a human so that we could know Him and find constant companionship through His Holy Spirit. Don’t let your doubts or the skepticism of someone you care about be a hindrance to connecting with  God. Remember even in the midst of doubt, He is with us.

The song “A Strange Way to Save the World” sung from the perspective of Joseph gives an example of what it looks like to wrestle before God with honest questions. Listen and let it give you a fresh perspective on the Christmas story.

This post was inspired by a December sermon series at CPC Danville entitled “With Us.” Click here to watch the first sermon by Pastor Tyler Scott.

“With Us” banner on the header provided by CPC Danville.