Category: Revenge

The GOAT Part 6: Revenge and Enemies

You don’t have to search very hard to find songs, books, movies, and shows based on the theme of revenge. Plot lines about characters retaliating for wrongs committed against them are plentiful. Just do a quick internet search and you’ll find a variety of titles to entertain you and tutor you in the art of revenge.  It’s human nature to want to get even, but it’s not biblical. Jesus’ teaching in the Sermon on the Mount makes that clear:

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’ But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well. If anyone forces you to go one mile, go with them two miles. Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you.” (Matthew 5:38-42, NIV)

Jesus counters our natural desire to retaliate. This new interpretation of an Old Testament command separates the responsibility of the government to punish evildoers justly from our personal responsibility to love our enemies. We’re not called to seek retribution for personal slights and are told to ignore personal insults (that’s the meaning of “turn the other cheek”). One commentary explains, “Christians must be willing to give more of their material goods, time, and labor than required, even if the demands upon us are unjust. We should loan to those who want to borrow, love our enemies, and pray for those who persecute us. Enforcing ‘an eye for an eye’ is the magistrate’s job; forgiving our enemies is ours.”1

The commentary continues: “Jesus’ limiting of the ‘eye for an eye’ principle doesn’t prohibit self-defense or the forceful protection of the innocent from harm. The actions of duly appointed agents of the government, such as police officers and the military, to protect citizens and preserve the peace are not in question. Jesus’ command to turn the other cheek applies to personal relationships, not judicial policy. The principle of ‘an eye for an eye’ is meant as a judicial policy, not as a rule for interpersonal relationships.”2

Turning the other cheek also doesn’t imply pacifism. It’s simply a command to refrain from retaliation for personal offenses. Jesus wasn’t setting government foreign policy, just calling His followers not to worry about defending their personal “rights” or avenging their honor.3

The next portion of Jesus’ teaching is equally challenging:

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor: and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.” (Matthew 5:43-48, NIV)

When someone hurts us, our natural reaction is to protect ourselves and fight back, but Jesus calls us to a higher standard. He exemplified this by never retaliating when someone wronged Him, which happened many times. His own people rejected His message (John 1:11); religious leaders mocked and tried to trap Him (John 8:6); His family was ashamed of Him and tried to make Him stop preaching (Mark 3:21); His friends deserted Him when He needed them most (Mark 14:50); the city who had cried “Hosanna!” when He arrived on Palm Sunday shouted “Crucify Him!” a few days later (Mark 15:13). So, when Jesus said to pray for our enemies, He knew what He was talking about.

Jesus provided the perfect example when He was being nailed to a cross. In the middle of His agony, He cried out, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” (Luke 23:34, ESV). Jesus had compassion on the people who believed they were doing the right thing by killing Him. By pointing out that they didn’t know what they were doing, He showed us several important factors that reveal how to pray for our enemies:

1. Opening Spiritual Eyes: We can pray that God will open the eyes of their hearts that they will be enlightened about truth (Ephesians 1:18). When enemies set themselves against us, they lack understanding. They are reacting from the flesh instead of responding from the Spirit. We can pray that God will open the eyes of their hearts to see us and others through the lens of the Lord’s love and wisdom.

2. Repenting of Sin: As we struggle with our enemies, we can pray for their repentance. When we pray for our enemies to repent, we know our prayers are aligned with God’s will because He also desires their repentance (2 Peter 3:9).

3. Keeping a Soft Heart: When we pray for our enemies, we can ask that our hearts will remain soft. Perhaps the Lord wants to use us to accomplish His plan in the lives of our enemies. “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1, ESV). When we return anger for anger, wrong for wrong, we put ourselves on the same level as our enemies. But when we respond with kindness, gentleness, and mercy, the situation is often diffused. Nothing is more convicting than a gentle response to a hateful, rude action. It’s what turning the other cheek is all about. Satan desires discord, so he tries to stir up our fury and goads us to respond in kind. We should pray that God keeps our hearts soft toward those who offend us so that His goodness will be revealed to them through us.

4. Aligning with God’s Will: Jesus taught us to pray, “Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven” (Matthew 6:10, ESV). It is always right to ask that God’s will be done in any situation. We should pray that He’ll enable us to want what He wants. If He desires to bless our enemies, we want that, too. If He wants us to serve our enemies in some way, then that’s what we desire. Prayer is the aligning of our wills with God’s; when we pray for our enemies, we need to wrestle through our emotions until we truly want God’s best in their lives.

Praying for our enemies is not a natural response to their mistreatment of us. But remembering that we were once enemies of God ourselves, and that we are now His children should change our perspective. We can intercede for others who need the Lord’s help and guidance. Doing this keeps our own hearts free from bitterness (Hebrews 12:15). In praying for our enemies, we become more like Christ, and we keep ourselves aligned with God’s will, which is how we strive toward being perfect as He is perfect.4

Quotes and content of this post are a compilation of information from the following articles:

1. https://www.gotquestions.org/eye-for-an-eye.html

2. https://www.gotquestions.org/eye-for-an-eye.html

3. https://www.gotquestions.org/turn-other-cheek.html

4. https://www.gotquestions.org/pray-for-your-enemies.html

This post also complements the sermon by Ryan Suzuki at CPC Danville. Click here to watch.

Bad Story, Good Lessons

She was a young teenager, the only daughter among a crowd of sons. Living in a new place, she was curious about clothes, customs, and social events that were different from her family’s. Most likely she was also a little naïve, not considering the harm that could come to her by sneaking away to mix with new friends at a local festival.

He was accustomed to getting his way. As a young man of privilege, he probably carried a sense of entitlement. When he saw something he wanted, he took it and dealt with the consequences later. Maybe he knew his powerful father would follow behind him to clean up the mess. So when he saw the new girl in town, he didn’t think twice about pursuing her. Maybe it started out as a friendly flirtation, but it quickly escalated into something entirely different. No one had any idea how the collision of these two lives would forever change the city and the family who had come to live on its outskirts.

Sounds like the makings of a modern movie, doesn’t it? Actually, it’s the story of Jacob’s daughter, Dinah, and the prince of Shechem, as told in the book of Genesis (with a bit of creative license based on commentaries). It’s a sordid tale that makes us uncomfortable, but there are things we can learn if we’re willing to move past our squeamishness. Finding personal application in it reminds us that times have changed, but human nature has remained the same.

Dinah’s Downfall: “Now Dinah the daughter of Leah, whom she had borne to Jacob, went out to see the women of the land. And when Shechem the son of Hamor the Hivite, the prince of the land, saw her, he seized her and lay with her and humiliated her. And his soul was drawn to Dinah the daughter of Jacob. He loved the young woman and spoke tenderly to her. So Shechem spoke to his father Hamor, saying, ‘Get me this girl for my wife.’” (Genesis 34:1-3, NIV)

Scholars believe Dinah was a young adolescent, somewhere between the ages of 12 and 16. Naturally, she was curious and interested in developing her social life, as most teens would be. But her parents hadn’t equipped her with the wisdom to recognize the dangers of the outside world. No one explained how vulnerable she would be out on her own, even in a place that looked so inviting. In fact, no one seemed to be paying much attention to her until it was too late. 

It’s tempting to point the finger of blame at the family members who didn’t seem to value Dinah enough to watch out for her. But how often can we be guilty of the same today? Teenagers may look like adults who eagerly exert their independence, but we’re fooling ourselves if we think they know how to navigate the world entirely on their own (both online and in real life). Sheltering adolescents seems like a quick fix, but isn’t realistic or beneficial to them. Leaving them to their own devices isn’t the answer either. We need to find middle ground where we’re engaged in their lives and connecting with them consistently so we can earn their trust. Only then will they be open to receiving the truth and wisdom they need from adults to make wise choices. If you’re not parenting a teen, you still have opportunities to connect and pour into them in many ways—whether it’s as a grandparent, an aunt or uncle, a neighbor, a youth leader, a co-worker, a work supervisor, a teacher, a mentor, a coach, a tutor, or any other role that puts you in contact with this precious and vulnerable age group. (See below for helpful resources on understanding teens and their world).

Dinah’s Brothers Misuse God’s Covenant: “The sons of Jacob answered Shechem and his father Hamor deceitfully, because he had defiled their sister Dinah. They said to them, ‘We cannot do this thing, to give our sister to one who is uncircumcised, for that would be a disgrace to us. Only on this condition will we agree with you—that you will become as we are by every male among you being circumcised.  Then we will give our daughters to you, and we will take your daughters to ourselves, and we will dwell with you and become one people. But if you will not listen to us and be circumcised, then we will take our daughter, and we will be gone.’” (Genesis 34:13-17, NIV)

Jacob’s sons used the sacred sign of God’s covenant as a tool of manipulation. Insisting that all the men of the town be circumcised was a ruse for making them vulnerable to attack. Using anything God has given us to inflict harm on others has no place in the life of a believer. It’s dishonoring to Him and defiles the sacred things He’s given us. The Church has had many shameful seasons in history when hateful acts were committed in the name of the Lord. We shouldn’t use pressure or manipulation to force people into God’s ways. Our role is to plant seeds of faith, it’s the Holy Spirit who makes them grow and brings true life transformation.

Dinah’s Brothers Take Revenge: “And all who went out of the gate of his city listened to Hamor and his son Shechem, and every male was circumcised, all who went out of the gate of his city. On the third day, when they were sore, two of the sons of Jacob, Simeon and Levi, Dinah’s brothers, took their swords and came against the city while it felt secure and killed all the males. They killed Hamor and his son Shechem with the sword and took Dinah out of Shechem’s house and went away. The sons of Jacob came upon the slain and plundered the city, because they had defiled their sister.” (Genesis 34:24-27, NIV)

Simeon and Levi decided to stand up for their sister and take their revenge to a gruesome extreme. In the process, they ruined the lives of everyone in Shechem and made their family a stench in the land. What they did was so detestable that their father cursed them on his deathbed:

“Simeon and Levi are brothers—  their swords   are weapons of violence. Let me not enter their council, let me not join their assembly, for they have killed men in their anger and hamstrung oxen as they pleased. Cursed be their anger, so fierce, and their fury, so cruel! I will scatter them in Jacob and disperse them in Israel.” (Genesis 49:5-7, NIV)

Dinah’s brothers probably imagined how satisfying it would be to get revenge, but it backfired on them in the end.  When we’ve been wronged, Scripture instructs us not to give in to our thirst for revenge: “Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: ‘It is mine to avenge; I will repay,’ says the Lord. On the contrary: ‘If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.’ Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” (Romans 12:17-21, NIV) Rather than bringing peace and contentment, revenge only escalates painful situations and perpetuates hate and violence. Trust God to handle vengeance and do your best to live at peace with everyone.

How I wish Dinah could have heard the words of “Rescue” by Lauren Daigle. Let the song comfort you and remind you of God’s attentiveness in whatever difficulties you’re facing. (Once you click below, a new window will open, then click “Watch on YouTube”).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MgkNB4939YM

Want more info on how to understand teens and their culture? Check out these resources:

Axis.org

Teenesteem.org

Chapclark.com