Staring at the computer screen, a lump formed in my throat as music filled my ears and images flashed before my eyes. Tears streamed down my face as an overwhelming sense of awe swept over me. Once the final note of the song had played, I brushed the tears away from my cheeks and tried to fathom why an awesome, all-powerful God would choose to have a relationship with a finite and sinful person like me (and really with any person at any point in history).
It all started as I was looking for a worship song to accompany the first week of a new Bible study, Jen Wilkin’s God of Creation. I didn’t anticipate ending up in a heap of tears when I clicked “play” to watch a lyric video of Hiillsong United’s “So Will I (10 Billion X),” but that’s exactly what happened. I guess the visuals helped me realize how the song brilliantly and beautifully sums up the message of Scripture.
As I read the lyrics and watched the accompanying images on the screen, the song gave me a deeper understanding of the wonder of God’s creation, sovereignty, and grace. Scattered throughout the lines are references to key points in Scripture. In a span of about ten minutes, I located numerous passages with direct correlations to the song’s lyrics. Each one tells something about the wonder of God’s creation and His redemption of humankind. Here are a few of them:
-God was there at there at the start of creation, before the beginning of time (Genesis 1:1-3)
-The vapor of His breath formed the planets (Psalm 33:6-9)
-The heavens declare His glory (Psalm 19:1-4)
-Everything God created reveals His nature and points praise back to Him: angels, the heavenly hosts, sun, moon, stars, creatures of the sea, lightning, hail, snow, clouds, wind, mountains, hills, trees, animals, birds, kings, princes, rulers, young and old, men and women (Psalm 148)
-No word God speaks is in vain, nothing He says comes back void (Isaiah 55:11)
-Rocks cry out to Him in praise (Luke 19:40)
-God chases down our hearts through all of our failure and pride (Matthew 18:10-14 & Romans 8:1-4)
-Jesus was abandoned in darkness to die (Mark 15:33-34)
-As God speaks forgiveness, our failures disappear (Psalm 103:12, Romans 6:23, 1 John 1:9)
-Jesus lost His life so that we could find ours and He left the grave behind, just as we will (1 Corinthians 15:22)
-Jesus gladly chose to surrender His position of equality with God and died to save us. He calls us to surrender our lives to others in love, just as He did (Philippians 2:4-8)
-God never leaves us behind (Matthew 18:10-14, Hebrews 13:5b)
Fixating on how, why or when God created the earth distracts us from the most basic fact laid out in Scripture—simply that He did create it. Realizing that our lives are tiny blips in the Lord’s grand scheme is both inspiring and humbling. He has always been and always will be. He knows what came before we existed and what will happen long after we’re gone. He sees the big picture that we’re incapable of grasping. He stands outside the boundaries of time and intellectual comprehension that limit us.
I’ve intentionally kept this post short so you’ll take the time look up a few of the Scriptures listed above. (If you only have time for one, read Psalm 148.) Take a moment to watch and listen to the video. Read the lyrics and enjoy the pictures that illustrate them so beautifully. Let the words of praise overwhelm you in the very best way. Although people today overuse the word “awesome,” this is one place where it’s exactly the right word to describe who God is and what He’s done for us.
Click on the link now and enjoy Hillsong United’s “So Will I (100 Billion X).” Trust me, you’re going to miss out if you skip over this part of the post. Taking a few minutes to reflect on the awesomeness of God is well worth your time.
Jen Wilkin, God of Creation: A Study of Genesis 1-11, Lifeway Press 2017 (Week 2)
Intimacy with the Lord comes through authentic connection with Him. Once we’ve dropped our facades and started being honest in prayer, our relationships with Him grow deeper.
It all started with a simple desire to remodel our home. We had no idea God planned to use such an “unspiritual” situation to test and refine our faith. He took us on a long, painful journey through the wilderness. In fact, I’ve spent the last several years writing the entire story and pursuing options for getting it published.
Reading Priscilla Shirer’s words inspired me to share an excerpt from my manuscript that illustrates her point: “The exodus was for this moment—when God’s people would be brought unto Himself and begin intimate fellowship and covenant with Him. This was His goal above getting them to Canaan.” (One in a Million, p. 84)
Below you’ll find a portion of my family’s remodel story: From Our Mess to God’s Best.
Over the months, the process of remodeling our tiny home had been filled with revealing moments…We’d anticipated the financial cost of the project and the inconvenience it would cause, but had failed to recognize the emotional and spiritual toll it would take on us.
The thought of having our faith stretched by our remodel hadn’t occurred to my husband or me. We’d learned to trust God through a number of hardships and had favorite Bible verses that comforted us through job transitions, difficult relationships, anxiety, depression and the deaths of family members. We believed God used hardships for good and had seen evidence of it in our lives.
However, we also prided ourselves in our self-sufficiency and our ability to problem-solve smaller issues on our own. Good planning and common sense had kept daily life orderly for almost seventeen years of marriage. We’d never considered that the Lord had things to teach us through the problems that arose from living in a privileged, industrialized society. God was using a mess of our own making to transform us from the inside out, whether we wanted Him to or not…
One of the first challenges came before the bulk of the remodel had even started. Our contractor wouldn’t make eye contact as he told us the news. “The city’s building department rejected the plans.”
For a moment we were speechless, unable to process this development…The city’s issues meant the modest remodel that was so much smaller than our original dreams now needed to be scaled back even further. We had orchestrated our time line down to the last detail and anticipated construction beginning just after Christmas, once everything had been approved. We had no time buffer for delays in our idealized schedule. This remodel had been years in the making. We’d run short on patience and were ready to start…We never imagined there would be a problem with the plan approval…
The contractor left and my husband closed the door and disappeared into the office without saying a word. An overwhelming combination of disappointment, anger and defeat felt like a wave crashing down on me. Neither one of us seemed able to talk about how we were feeling without making things worse.
I retreated to our bedroom, closed the door and lay face down on the floor with my arms spread wide. The coarse carpet fibers pressed into my forehead and the faint smell of dusty shoes filled my nostrils. My emotions were so raw I could hardly formulate words to pray. The room was quiet and warm as rain drummed on the roof. I was too tense to let the tears flow. For the first few minutes, all I could do was breathe deeply. With each exhale I tried to release all of the negative things I was feeling. Bitterness. Anger. Confusion. Mistrust. With each inhale a different word would come to mind. Peace. Wisdom. Clarity. Direction. Eventually more words came and with my face to the floor, I wrestled silently with God in a one-sided conversation.
Why did you say ‘yes’ to the remodel and then allow this roadblock? Should we keep moving forward, or are you telling us to stop? Why did you let me get excited if this whole thing is going to fall apart like all the other times? What are we supposed to be learning from this?
Despite the physical discomfort, I remained face down in total surrender. Slowly I began to remember God’s faithfulness to us over the years. He usually didn’t do things the way we dictated, and they always ended up turning out better than we could have imagined. I thought of job searches, strained relationships, and challenging moments serving at church. God came through for us every single time. Fragments of different verses that had strengthened us through the hard times in the past came to mind.
I will never leave you or forsake you… I know the plans I have for you…You will find me when you seek me with all your heart…I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living…Be still and know that I am God.
As the promises flooded my mind, God gently pried open my tight fists of control and I held my hands palms up. I was ready to receive whatever the Lord wanted to give and trusted that He still had a plan. I knew there was a purpose for this setback, something we needed to work through before we could come out the other side. I got up from the floor and reached for my journal in the bedside table. Writing prayers had always been a way for me to connect with God.
God, I pray you would help us to trust in you even when things seem to make no sense. Please help us not to fret and to trust that you will make a way. I look forward with anticipation to how you will sort out this frustrating situation. God, please help us to conduct ourselves and treat others in a way that honors you through this process. Please give us wisdom, creativity and tenacity. I trust you even though I can’t see the way forward through this. God, please help us to keep a healthy perspective and to keep our eyes on you.
As I finished writing in my journal, inexplicable peace washed over me. I had no idea how this situation was going to work out, but I trusted that it would. God already knew the outcome and I could thank Him for that.
I emerged from the bedroom and found my husband sitting in our home office with his legs propped up on the desk and leaning back in his chair. His opened Bible rested on his lap. It was a relief to see that even though we retreated from each other, we’d both pursued God for wisdom and answers. (From Our Mess to God’s Best, Marybeth McCullum)
God knew our struggles with the remodel and waited patiently until we were desperate enough to wrestle through our frustrations with Him. We had no idea He also was teaching us to rely on Him in preparation for bigger challenges yet to unfold. Our growing dependence on Him was vital for giving us the strength we would need.
Intimacy with the Lord comes through authentic connection with Him. Once we’ve dropped our facades and started being honest in prayer, our relationships with Him grow deeper. The Psalms are filled with David and other writers grappling with their frustrations in the presence of God. One of my favorite invitations to be honest before God is Psalm 62:8: “Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.” (NIV) Our honest laments are the first step toward letting Him change our perspectives.
Through my wilderness experience with our disastrous remodel, I stopped asking God, “Why?” and started asking: “What do You want me to learn? How are You revealing Yourself to me?” When I relinquished my illusion of control and surrendered my sense of entitlement, God enabled me to find deeper intimacy with Him than I’d ever had before.
I pray you’ll find the same thing to be true in your wilderness. Instead of just seeking answers or solutions, seek greater intimacy with Him. Regardless of how your circumstances unfold, you won’t be disappointed.
Whenever I hear Phillip Phillips’ song “Home” I think of my crazy home remodel and imagine God singing the lyrics of the song to my family. I hope it encourages you in your wilderness journey too.
Shirer, Priscilla; One in a Million– Journey to Your Promised Land; Lifeway Press; 2010 & 2014
The music from my car’s radio turned to static as I wound my way through the Santa Cruz Mountains on Highway 17. I clicked the knob off and breathed a prayer: God, thanks for being with me wherever I go. I’ve prayed a lot about this trip and you know what I need, so I’m not going to keep saying it. Please help me to be silent now and just feel your presence.
Half an hour later I was pulling into a parking space at the conference center. My heart thudded in my chest as I walked past a cheerful sign saying “Welcome Mount Hermon Christian Writers.” I chastised myself silently: Yesterday you spoke to a room full of women and assured them that “God + Me = A Majority.” Do you believe that’s true in your own life today?
It was my first time to the conference and I’d felt some dread in the months leading up to it. I was nervous about spending four nights away from my family with several hundred writers, literary agents, editors and publishers. Knowing I was a rookie and that I didn’t know a soul attending didn’t help. To say it was a step out of my comfort zone would be an understatement.
I found reassurance reminding myself that I wasn’t alone and never would be. I tried to let the title of my talk travel from my head to my heart: “God + Me = A Majority.” I repeated the line several times to grasp its truth. God came up the mountain with me. He would also meet me there and connect me to others who knew Him. I could trust Him because His promises were true.
I thought about all of the people I’d referenced in my talk the day before. Throughout the Bible God promised many people He would be with them: Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Moses, Joshua, Joseph, Jeremiah and Gideon—to name a few. In Hebrews we find this promise for all who follow Jesus: “God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.’” (Hebrews 13:5b)
The only reason we can claim this promise is that Jesus made it possible for us. His death on the cross allows us to have direct and permanent access to God. As we celebrate Holy Week, it seems only fitting to consider the price Jesus paid so that we will never be forsaken by God.
While He walked the earth, Jesus took great comfort in knowing His Father was with Him. On the night before He was crucified, He told His disciples in the garden: “A time is coming and in fact has come when you will be scattered, each to your own home. You will leave me all alone. Yet I am not alone, for my Father is with me.” (John 16:32) He knew His closest friends would desert Him in His hour of greatest need, yet He took comfort knowing His Father was there with Him.
A day later, Jesus had been arrested, beaten and nailed to a cross. His pain was not only physical, but also spiritual and emotional. This was the only time in His earthly life He could not find comfort in His Father’s presence. As He suffered in agony, He cried out the words of David from Psalm 22 “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” The Wycliffe Bible Commentary explains: “The Father withdrew from communion with the Son. No longer did he evidence his love toward the son. Instead Christ had become the object of the Father’s displeasure, for he was the sinner’s substitute. Christ became ‘sin for us’ and a holy God cannot look with favor upon sin.” (Wycliffe Bible Commentary, 1990 edition, p. 1024)
Jesus took the punishment that we deserved so that we never have to experience being forsaken by God. The very thing that comforts us most as Christians was denied to Him.
Thinking about this makes my heart swell with gratitude. His sacrifice on the cross not only enables us to have eternal life, it also allows us to have the comfort of knowing He walks with us daily.
Knowing this truth should make us passionate about sharing it with others. How could we keep it to ourselves when there is a world desperately in need of hope? One of the best ways we can show Jesus gratitude for His work on the cross is by being lights for Him.
“You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” (Matthew 5:14-16)
There are so many different ways we can do this with our actions, attitudes and words. Our neighborhoods, schools and secular workplaces provide abundant opportunities to shine for Jesus. When we help an underserved population locally or overseas, we are bringing light to darkness. Sometimes it can be as simple as showing love and grace when we’re tempted to dish out judgment and criticism. The options are limitless. God gives us the gifts we need and equips us to bring light to the darkness. Our job is to step out obediently to use what He’s given us. This might sound a little intimidating, but we can rest assured that He will be with us and that “God + Me = A Majority.”
Click on the link below to be inspired by Christy Nockels’ song “Life Light Up.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qNZ6L6qGR7s
If you missed my talk at Focused Living, you can access it through my Facebook page: Marybeth Mc Cullum – Author (due to privacy settings I am unable to post it here)
(The title “God + Me = A Majority” was borrowed from an episode of Focus on the Family’s Adventures in Odyssey).
