Almost before he could walk, my son loved anything with wheels. He played with toy cars constantly and was naturally drawn to the world of professional auto racing from a very young age. As a pre-schooler, he dressed up as his favorite NASCAR driver for Halloween and by elementary school, he had most of the drivers’ names, car numbers, and sponsors memorized. Watching Sunday afternoon races on TV became a regular practice in our household. Although I’ve never sat through an entire race from start to finish, I’ve learned a few things about the sport.
One of the key aspects of car racing is the use of colored flags to communicate to drivers and spectators. Most of us are familiar with the image of a black and white checkered flag that signals the end of a race and the declaration of a winner. I’ve learned there are many other colored flags during a NASCAR race that are used before that one however: a yellow flag means “caution” and indicates hazardous conditions, a red flag brings the race to a halt temporarily, and a green flag allows the race to resume. A black flag denotes a rule violation and means a driver must return to the pit and a white flag signals the last lap of the race.
Much like those colored NASCAR flags, our feelings help us to interpret our surroundings and determine how to proceed. Unfortunately, however, our feelings aren’t always reliable. When we depend on them solely to make decisions, they may lead us astray. Like the colored flags, they tell us there is a reason to react, but often don’t equip us to handle the situation accurately. For example, we might not always “feel” like following through with a commitment we’ve made, but when we remember the reason we agreed to do it and recognize how God is using it, we push past our feelings and persevere. For this reason, we must filter our feelings through our minds and the Holy Spirit to determine how to proceed. Many times, we’ll discover we need to press on, despite how we feel.
Take the Old Testament character of Ruth, for example. In chapter 1 of Ruth, we learn that she’d lost her husband and had committed to travel to Judah with her grieving mother-in-law. As a Moabite, she chose to leave behind her homeland, culture, and family to stay with Naomi. She put her faith in the God of Israel and walked away from the idol-worship of her people.
Chapter 2 in the book of Ruth opens with the two returning to Naomi’s hometown of Bethlehem penniless and alone. As widows, they had no safety net and no obvious connection to family members who would look out for them. So, Ruth made a practical decision for the sake of their survival:
“And Ruth the Moabite said to Naomi, ‘Let me go to the fields and pick up the leftover grain behind anyone in whose eyes I find favor’ …So she went out, entered a field and began to glean behind the harvesters. As it turned out, she was working in a field belonging to Boaz, who was from the clan of Elimelek…Boaz asked the overseer of his harvesters, ‘Who does that young woman belong to?’ The overseer replied, ‘She is the Moabite who came back from Moab with Naomi. She said, “Please let me glean and gather among the sheaves behind the harvesters.” She came into the field and has remained here from morning till now, except for a short rest in the shelter.’
So Boaz said to Ruth, ‘My daughter, listen to me. Don’t go and glean in another field and don’t go away from here. Stay here with the women who work for me. Watch the field where the men are harvesting, and follow along after the women. I have told the men not to lay a hand on you.’” (Ruth 2:2-9 abridged)
So, what feelings might Ruth have had to overcome to provide for herself and Naomi?
Shame: Gleaning fields was for the poor and destitute. Ruth’s choice to do this meant putting aside her pride and accepting that she had descended to the bottom rung of society’s ladder.
Emotional Exhaustion: It’s likely that living with her bitter mother-in-law in poverty drained her emotionally, yet she pressed on to provide food for them.
Physical Exhaustion: Gleaning in the fields was probably back-breaking labor in the hot sun, yet the story tells us Ruth worked so hard she earned the respect of the hired hands and the the field owner, Boaz.
Grief: Ruth had lost her husband, left her homeland and parents, and was living as a pauper. Being relegated to do manual labor only added insult to injury. She could have wallowed in her emotional pain and used it as a reason to stop trying, but she didn’t.
Fear: The fact that Boaz told his men not to lay a hand on her hints that it was not uncommon for women in her positon to be used and abused by those who had more power. As a foreign woman alone, without ties to male relatives who could protect her, Ruth was incredibly vulnerable. She was easy prey for anyone that wanted to take advantage of her. Fear of being harmed could have been a reasonable excuse not to follow through with gleaning in the fields.
While it’s unlikely anyone reading this would find themselves in a similar situation to Ruth, there is much we can learn from her example. Take a moment to consider the role feelings typically play in your decision-making process. How often do you opt out of something because you just don’t feel like doing it? How often do you press on because you realize it’s worth it in the long run? Do you allow your emotions alone to guide your decisions or do you balance them with reason and intellect? Do you invite the Holy Spirit to help you interpret your feelings and to show you how to respond? Do you consult Scripture to access biblical wisdom?
Consider the words of the writer of Hebrews who gives us Jesus as the ultimate example to follow:
“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.” (Hebrews 12:1-3, NIV)
Decide right now that you won’t let your emotions be your primary guide. Don’t ignore your feelings, but don’t let them be the only factor you consider when making decisions. Step back and look at the big picture. Consider God’s perspective and then decide the best way to proceed. In the long run, you’ll be more apt to wave that checkered flag of victory knowing you followed through despite how you felt.
Listen to Lauren Daigle’s song “Look Up Child” and be reminded where to fix your eyes when you’re tempted to let your emotions take the lead.
Nicki Koziarz, A Woman Who Doesn’t Quit, Lifeway Press, 2018.