More Like Jesus

Opening Megan Fate Marshman’s book Meant for Good: The Adventure of Trusting God & His Plans for You made me curious, but also skeptical. The cynical side of me wondered what more we could learn from two Bible passages that most Christians have heard many times: Jeremiah 29:11-13 and Romans 8:28-9. But as I delved further, I realized these Scriptures overflow with spiritual truth that we may miss at first glance.

You may be familiar with Jeremiah 29:11 since it’s often used to reassure people in times of uncertainty: “’For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.’” (Jeremiah 29:11-13, NIV) 

This passage was originally written to Jewish people who had been living as exiles in Babylon. The Lord had allowed them to be carried into captivity as a consequence for their worship of idols and rebellion against Him. The hope-filled future this passage promises ties directly to the state of their hearts. As they turned back to the Lord, He would listen to them and they would be able to renew a genuine relationship with Him.

In the original Hebrew, the word “heart” describes “the most interior organ” and encompasses our minds and our inner being. Strong’s Concordance explains that the heart is the seat of desire, inclination, or will. It is also the well of emotions, knowledge, and wisdom. All of our thoughts, desires, words, and actions flow from the heart.  So, when we’re seeking God with all our hearts, our gaze is fixed steadily on Him. This is what the Lord wanted for His people when they were captives in Babylon, and it’s what He wants for us today.

Another oft-quoted verse that Megan covers in her book is Romans 8:28-9:

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters.” (Romans 8:28-29, NIV)

Most of us know verse 28 well, however, reading verse 29 is essential to understanding the definition for “good” in this context. We often interpret it to mean easy, comfortable, pleasant, or favorable. For many of us, “good” is synonymous with getting what we want, when we want—or having events unfold according to our desires. However, in the original Greek, the word “good” describes that which is beneficial in its effect. One commentary explains “The things themselves may not be good, but God harmonizes them together for believers’ ultimate good, because His goal is to bring them to perfection in His presence. Even adversities and afflictions contribute to that end…this is a continuing activity of God. And His working is on behalf of ‘those who love Him,’ who are further identified as the ones who have been called according to His purpose.” 

According to Romans 8:29, the ultimate “good” in God’s purpose is for us to be more like Jesus. So, when we seek Him with all of our hearts, we trust that whatever events unfold will be used to transform us to be more like Jesus—not to make us comfortable or to make our lives easier or happier. 

At this point, you may be thinking this definition of “good” doesn’t sound very enticing. So, let me share a personal example to show how hard things can be good and can make us more like Jesus.

Three years ago, my eighty-three-year-old mom was living on her own in the house where I grew up. Her health was starting to slip, but she was stubborn and independent and had no interest in moving. Unfortunately, a series of medical issues landed her in the hospital. When she was released, she decided to move into an assisted living community near my home where she could maintain her freedom but have more support when she needed it.

Over the next two years, my mom and I found a rhythm. I managed her bills, her house, her medical appointments, and her care. I got to know her friends, her schedule, her habits, and her needs more intimately than I ever had before. My four siblings helped when they could, but the responsibility for my mom rested mostly on me. This made sense since I lived much closer than all of them. I tried hard to be gracious and understanding about my siblings’ busy lives and the many valid things that kept them from being involved more consistently. As time progressed, I even preferred handling most of my mom’s affairs on my own. It was easier and less complicated than having them opt in where and when they could. I didn’t see it at the time, but in hindsight I recognize that pride and resentment were beginning to build in me.

Two years later, when my mom was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and given months to live, my siblings all jumped to action, wanting to be involved and informed about every detail. They came to town often to be supportive and to spend as much time with our mom as possible. I welcomed and encouraged their involvement, but also felt some underlying anger. Suddenly I was managing my mom’s care while coordinating visiting schedules and trying to keep her house in order for them. I was feeling territorial and grasping for control amidst many disruptions in my life, but I didn’t see it at the time. Resentment was lurking beneath the surface, but I ignored it and acted like everything was fine. Still, my unacknowledged anger leaked out of me, robbing me of sleep and making me irritable and impatient with others. When I finally recognized what I was feeling, I started praying daily, asking God to take my thoughts captive and to make them obedient to Christ. (2 Corinthians 10:5) Over time, He answered those prayers, helping me to release my bitterness and resentment and to find grace and gratitude for my siblings’ presence and involvement.

 God worked through that hard season to refine me and to help me understand myself better. He conformed me to be just a bit more like Christ by exposing my pride and resentment and covering it with His grace. His goodness softened my heart and fostered healthier relationships in my family. There’s no doubt I’ll continue to grapple with those negative emotions at times. But I also know that as I seek Him, He will bring about His good purposes and continue making me more like Jesus.

The verses from Jeremiah and Romans highlighted in Meant for Good contain powerful and transformative truth. I’m excited to study them with you over the next six weeks. Let’s start by listening to Fernando Ortega’s “Lord, I Want to Be Like Jesus” and making it our prayer throughout this study.

  • Megan Fate Marshman, Meant for Good: The Adventure of Trusting God & His Plans for You, Zondervan, 2020.
  • Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance of the Bible, Thomas Nelson Publishers, 2001.
  • John F. Walvoord and Roy B. Zuck, The Bible Knowledge Commentary, Victor Books, 1983, page 474.

Transition Troubles

ike waves crashing on the beach, life is constantly moving and changing. We can try to dig our toes into the sand and refuse to accept change or we can frolic in the surf as it washes over us.

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The e-mail caught me by surprise when it landed in my inbox two months ago. A dear friend broke the news that she was moving 3000 miles away. To say it was a shock would be an understatement. We squeezed in time to meet once before she left to see her new house for the first time. A month later, she returned to California to take her son to college and say goodbye to friends. It was a fast transition with no lead up–I was nowhere near ready to say goodbye. I know we’ll both be processing this huge change for months to come. I miss her already, but I trust that God has good things in store for both of us.

It seems everywhere I turn I’m encountering people dealing with transitions right now. Some of them are just part of our life stages: families leaving beloved elementary schools as their children begin middle school and other families taking kids to college for the first time. There are parents adjusting to having an empty nest and young adults trying to figure out life after college. Some are watching their kids get married and start families of their own. Others are wrapping up careers and navigating the unknown waters of retirement; some are selling homes and moving on now that their kids are grown. While these events are emotional, they are also evidence of positive growth and change.

Other transitions are more difficult to accept: the shift into single life resulting from divorce or the transition from being married to being widowed. There is the unwelcome transition from having a job to searching for a new one. Or the struggle of watching a close-knit community unravel and wondering how to move ahead.   These difficult transitions may be forced upon us, but we still have to learn how to live with them.

I’ll be the first to admit I don’t like times of transition. They are usually uncomfortable and awkward; often they are painful and difficult. But no matter what negative feelings I have about transitions, they are a part of life I’ve learned to accept and to entrust to God. When I’m still struggling to understand how to function as I transition from one thing to the next, I can trust that God already has a plan for me. I may not like the changes, but I can thank Him anyway and live expectantly knowing He has good things in store.

If you’re going through a transition, here are a few things that might help you navigate it and keep your focus in a healthy place:

-It’s OK to Grieve

Transitioning from one phase to the next means you have to leave something behind. It is healthy and normal to grieve the loss that the change is causing. If you’re trying to bottle up your negative emotions and put on a happy face, you’re going to struggle that much longer. Acknowledge your sadness to God and let yourself grieve for a while. Get help from a wise friend or counselor if you need it.

“Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.” (Psalm 62:8, NIV)

-It’s Not OK to Wallow

Sometimes we get stuck in a transition and can’t move on. It’s healthy to feel sad for a while, but not to make it a permanent habit of your mind. If we spend too much time lamenting painful changes in our lives over and over, it prevents us from looking ahead to see what God wants to do next. If you’re still living and breathing, then God still has plans for you. There is a time to move on.

“Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3:13b-14, NIV)

-It’s Good to Move Forward

Like waves crashing on the beach, life is constantly moving and changing. We can try to dig our toes into the sand and refuse to accept change or we can frolic in the surf as it washes over us. Either way, we’re going to get wet.  We can’t avoid being affected by what’s happening around us. You can trust God whether you know what life holds for you on the other side of your transition or not. Seek Him in the midst of your struggles and let Him lead you.

“’For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.’” (Jeremiah 29:11-13 NIV)

Continue reading “Transition Troubles”